Through the Darkness
by Neo Lady Bianca
Summary: Carlisle brings Bella and an abandoned baby girl together. The baby is in the fight of her life... Is Bella strong enough? What happens if this baby girl survives? What does the future hold?
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: Between New Moon and Eclipse... Yes, I know I'm messing with the timeline.

Getting out of the truck I pulled my jacket close as the cold blew in from the west. Closing the truck door I headed inside the hospital passing the front desk heading strait to the elevators. Pushing the up button I was glad to see no one in there as I got in and pressing the third floor and the door close button I watched the doors close. Walking to the back of the elevator I waited for the doors to open again I wondered if Carlisle was going to lecture me too. It seem to take forever I thought the stairs would have been faster. As the doors finally opened I wasn't surprised to see Carlisle waiting on me.

"Morning," I mumbled shyly.

"This way. I've got a special case I could use your help on," Carlisle smiled leading me down the hall.

"Me and blood," I started to say feeling a little sick just thinking about it.

"No, blood," Carlisle promised as he stopped in front of double doors.

"NICU," I barely got it know what was behind these doors.

"A woman gave birth about a week ago. She left the baby as soon after being discharged," Carlisle frowned as he spoke with clear disappointment.

"The baby," I questioned unable to wrap my head around someone leaving their baby in a life and death fight.

"She is hanging on amazingly. Barley one pound and fighting an uphill battle all the way. I'd like to try Kanagroo Care where we put the baby on someone's bare chest. It helps with heart rate, lung function, weight gain, and so much more. There is something about that connection through touch," Carlisle explained punching in a code and leading me into the NICU.

"Do you really think I could make a real difference," I asked as he stopped in front of an isolette.

"You'll make all the difference for this little girl," Carlisle reassured me with a warm smile.

"What do I do," I looked to Carlisle for instruction.

"Go with Nurse Taylor, and she help you," Carlisle motioned to to the nurse I hadn't noticed.

Following the Nurse to a bathroom she had me take off my shirt and replace it with a hospital gown that opened in the front.

"You'll be fine. Dr. Cullen wouldn't set this up if didn't think it would go well," Nurse Taylor whispered as she pulled out a hairband pulling my hair into a bun.

"Thanks," I whispered as she led me to out to large metal sinks, and she scrubbed my hands with soap and hot water.

Heading back to the isolette Nurse Taylor had me sit down in the rocking chair, and opened the gown just enough to place the baby. Eying Carlisle I watched as he picked up this tiny little baby placing her against my chest. Gently he took my hand placing to support the baby the right way.

Feeling her against me there was this connection that I felt linked me to this little person. Looking up I was glad to see Carlisle knelt next to me not leaving me alone with some nurse. Relaxing I noticed I could feel her every breath which surprised me because I hadn't expected. Seeing her so small and helpless I hadn't expected how fragile she actually was.

"You're both doing so good. The monitors look so good it is hopeful," Carlisle cooed trying to calm me.

"What's her name," I asked peering down at the baby.

"She doesn't have on yet," Carlisle replied simply.

"She needs a strong name," I stated more than questioned.

"What are you thinking," Carlisle inquired looking to me.

"Mercy Elizabeth," I said in a matter of fact tone.

"Interesting," Carlisle nodded thoughtfully.

"Mercy because it one word that describes you, and if she has one tenth of your strength everything will be okay. I know it might be silly, but Elizabeth after Edward's mom. From what you told me she was one tough lady," I answered the question that went unsaid.

"I know you'll never believe it, but you are so much stronger than you see," Carlisle smiled warmly.

"He's afraid to take this away from me. I know he talks to you about it. Until him I never even considered it, but I don't want any of it without him. Easily I could fall for this little girl; yet I couldn't do it without him. I'd adopt with him, and love them wholeheartedly as my own," I whispered as I looked up at Carlisle.

"He just wants you to have everything even if he can't give it to you," Carlisle replied softly has he put his hand on my knee.

"He gives me everything by just being," I blushing as my heart skips a beat with that simple truth.

Leaning my head back against the rest I closed my eyes relaxing. Then I feel it the electricity in the air I know he is in the room.

"Hi," came his voice making me open my eyes to see Edward had taken Carlisle's place.

"Snooping," I accused teasingly.

"Maybe a little. I wanted to see if it worked out, but I should know better than to bet against Alice," Edward admitted as he leaned over me kissing my forehead gentle.

"I've missed you," I said letting go of a breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

"We'll figure something out soon. Plus I'll come sit with you here as much as I can," Edward promised as he pulled a chair near me.

"I need to do some shopping with Alice. Yes, I know what I'm asking. As much as I don't want to I need warmer clothes, and I need to get my Christmas shopping done," I cringed as I spoke the words.

"Okay, I'll tell her," Edward shook his head a little.

Walking out of the hospital with Carlisle at my side I was glad to spend time with him today. I hoped that maybe we would get more chances to hang out together even if it was at the hospital of all places. Getting to my truck I turned to face Carlisle who stood there waiting on me, and knew he would wait there for me to say whatever I had to say unlike my loveable Renee.

"Thanks for letting me help. When do I come back," I asked wanting to see the baby again.

"We'll wait a few days and try again. You did really good," Carlisle smiled warmly.

"Can I come to see her," I continued my questioning.

"I'll add you to the list. Mercy could use all the allies she can get," Carlisle nodded as he opened the truck door for me.

"See you soon," I whispered getting in and Carlisle shut the door.

Waving goodbye I started the truck and pulled out of the parking spot. Getting out on the road I made my way home to Charlie who should be home by now. Really a part of me hoped he wasn't home because it meant I didn't have to talk to him about my day. We hadn't really talked for weeks since I came back, but me being out he would want to talk about it. Shaking the thought from my head I knew I'd just deal with it when the time came. Turning down the street I could see the lights on at the house insuring Charlie was home waiting. Pulling into the drive I killed the engine, and got out knowing there was no stalling with how loud my truck was. Taking a deep breath I got out of the truck heading inside to face him.

"Bells," Came Charlie's voice from the living room with baseball game on.

"I'm home," I replied as I took off my jacket hanging it up.

"What happened?" Charlie asked with interest.

"I was in the NICU," I said walking to the entrance to the living room.

"Sick babies?" Charlie continued his questioning.

"Yes," I nodded as I answered. "I'm not sure that's good," Charlie trailed off towards the end.

"Listen I'm letting you dictate to me who I see. This is something I'm doing. I'm eighteen which means adult. Also Alice is taking me shopping tomorrow I need warmer clothes," I marched off at the end into the kitchen.

Grabbing a cup I went for the coffee pouring me a cup taking it to the kitchen table taking a seat. Sipping the coffee slow I felt my cell vibrating in my pocket, so I put the coffee down pulling my cell out.

"Hello," I answered the cell still a little snippy.

"It's Alice," Alice chirped with a smile in her voice.

"Could you come over," I pleaded almost needing my friend.

"I'll be there soon. It'll be okay," Alice tried to reassure me. "Thanks," I whispered before hanging up.

When Alice arrived Charlie didn't say a word to either of us; which I was more than thankful for. I was glad when I spotted an overnight bag on her shoulder because I need my friend to night to talk with through the night about everything. Heading upstairs I lead her to my room, and point to where she could sit her bag on my dresser. Pulling Alice on the bed with me; I was glad she came.

"How was it?" Alice inquired looking me over.

"She was so small. I couldn't understand someone leaving her on her own. What mother could," I shook my head blinking back tears.

"Humans are strange sometimes. I doubt we'll ever understand it," Alice frowned slightly as she spoke.

"Carlisle had me give her a name. Mercy Elizabeth," I smirked as I spoke.

"I like it. Cute!" Alice nodded in approval.

"I couldn't believe Charlie tell me it wasn't," I started as it replayed in my mind.

"Don't go there. Just think about the good stuff," Alice cut me off at the pass.

"It was nice spending time with Carlisle too. At first I was wondering what he was thinking I'm such a klutz. Holding this little baby was amazing. I could feel every breath she took, and I could feel her little heart beating. That's when I realized how fragile and breakable she was," I said remembering my visit.

"She's also a lot stronger than you know. I think that's why Carlisle put you two together. You both are fighters. Plus you are the type of person who needs to be needed, and this little girl needs you whether she knows or not," Alice explained Carlisle's logic.

"Did I pass," I asked jokingly.

"Mercy hasn't done as good in her whole little life," Alice smirked with a knowing glance.

"I might regret this later I need to do some Christmas shopping, so I need you to do my clothes shopping," I admitted reluctantly.

"Yeah!" Alice cheered looking like it was already Christmas.

"There is a budget. Two hundred," I warned her making it clear.

"That fine I can do it," Alice sighed in slight disappointment.

"Promise me you won't look to what I'm going to get you. I want you to be surprise," I pleaded knowing she'd see as soon as I chose her gift.

"I'll try my best," Alice promised to be as good as she could.

"One more thing I need to make a special stop. I found something that was in a real estate sale, and the guy held onto it for me," I started a little excited about my find.

"Possible Whitlock heirloom," Alice mused as her eye blanked out for a moment.

"Maybe... Keep it to yourself," I begged not wanting to know anything more.

"Man, I'm having to be really good here. Mine better be really good," Alice crossed her arms teasingly pouting.


	2. Chapter 2

Letting Alice drive had been my less than stellar ideas, but I was distracted since I woke up this morning. That little face was all I could see, so when Alice asked to drive I agree without thinking. Now we were on our way to Seattle to shop until I can't move would be my guess. From there I would venture to say Alice will drag me to a few more before letting me return home. "The auction house should be here up on the right," Alice announced as I noticed we were in Freedom which was a town ten miles before you got to Seattle. There it was looked like some warehouse which made me glad Alice was with me. Getting out I headed toward the front door, and Alice was right behind me. "

This is creepy right? A little?" I whispered so she would only hear me.

"A bit," Alice answered speaking only loud enough for me to hear.

Heading inside I kept close to Alice who walked in step with me.

"Hello I'm Dave," came Dave's voice from behind the counter to our left.

"Bella Swan, I bought the Whitlock heirloom," I spoke up after swallowing hard as I closed the distance.

"I'll needed to see some I.D." Dave smiled slightly giving me the creeps.

"Why don't you go get what we came here for," Alice growled almost threatening yet sounding sweet.

"I'll get that for you," Dave mumbled heading in the back.

"Thanks," I mumbled Alice's way.

At that point I wanted to leave, but I also wanted to get the gift. Relief washed over me as a woman in her mid forties stepped out of the back with a wood box with Celtic carvings in the wood. It was a bit bigger than a jewelry box which was a little surprising.

"Miss Swan, here is Mrs. Bridget Victoria Whitlock's memory box as it was called back then. I'm Emma," Emma spoke as her voice dripped with an apologetic tone.

Carefully she opened the box picking up a photo carefully as she showed me and Alice.

"Wow," I stammered looking at the photo of the woman and man.

Looking at the woman ; she was tall willowy frame with long black hair plus eye that seemed to look strait through you. Then there was her husband who was built gentlman had blonde hair, and you could tell they were of some upper class.

"This is Thomas and Fiona on their wedding day," Emma said putting it away and brought a picture of twins.

"Twins," Alice asked with confusion in the undertone unnoticeable to anyone else.

"Jasper and Jackson Whitlock... I did a little research. Jackson died shortly after this photo. There could be many reasons for his death, but it mark as unknown on the death certificate," Emma explained putting the photo back and showing us a copy of a death certificate for Jackson.

"Thanks," I nodded slightly.

Back in the car I held on to the memory box smiling ear to ear because I was sure it would mean a lot to Jasper have these little things. Although I wanted to give this to him without everyone look at us both; which wasn't going to be easy with everything that had happened. To everyone else apart from Carlisle and maybe Alice; I wasn't to be left alone with Jasper ever.

"That picture is very unclear right now. Let's play it by ear," Alice mused as she drove.

"Fine, I guess," I grumbled crossing arms pouting a little.

"Jasper will love the gift. I know that without seeing," Alice chirped trying to brighten the mood.

"Now everyone else," I sighed looking out the window and then turn my attention back to the box.

"I'm not driving that fast. Also whatever you get will be prefect," Alice smirked as she made a turn.

Reaching behind me I put the box in the floorboard in the back gently. Turning back around I pulled my knees to my chest hiding my face; as my mind wondered to Mercy for the first time since I woke up. Something inside of me desperately wanted to be with her today, but I needed to get the clothes and gifts.

"You'll see her soon,"

Snapping up my head I stared at her; although I knew about her sight.

"I should be use to that by now," I mumbled laying my chin on my knees.

"It took years for the family," Alice said simply.

"Do you think it would be okay to get stuff for Mercy?" I asked having a few things in mind.

"Should be fine as far as I can see," Alice nodded smiling approvingly.

"I'm not asking about what is going to happen, but do you think I getting in to deep like Charlie? I think Edward is worried too," I asked afraid of what she'd say.

"You'll know when you've had enough. Only you can say that. Edward and Charlie can't say what's right for you. Not even me with an ideal of what could maybe happen. No one told you to go confront who will not be named, but there was something inside you that made you strong enough. I saw it surface again in full force in Italy," Alice solemnly spoke as she peered at me out of the corner of her eye.

Dumbfound I couldn't believe Alice being so serious, but in the next moment she was her chipper self as she turn the radio on. "Mr. Know It All" by Kelly Clarkson came on the radio, and Alice bobbed and hummed along to the song making me laugh a little. Listening to the lyrics I let myself let go moving to the beat just letting go everything that was going on. For a few minutes I was just Bella hanging out with her best friend.

Inside the Mall I headed to Game Stop knowing I couldn't go wrong in there for Emmett. Picking up a few game I had per-ordered that weren't out for a few more months. Four hours on the phone plus dipping into my new trust fund that I just got old enough for. Grandma Dawn had left me money I knew that; I just still had no ideal how much. Only thing I knew was I had gotten a check this month for thousand bucks. About half had went to clothes to Alice somewhere in the mall. Picking up the games already wrapped I paid, and head to my next stop this little garden. Looking around I found White English Rose Bush for Esme. As my luck would have it I got to stand in a line; I knew the game store had went to well. Half an hour later I finally got the plant bought.

"I'll take that out to the car," Alice grabbed the gifts as she appeared out of no where.

"I have barely nothing," I complained eying her.

"I'm saving you a nose dive," Alice explained walking away.

"Fine," I stuck my tongue out at her like I was five.

Carlisle was harder I went through three stores before I found it, and there it was marble chess set. As I bought it I felt really proud of myself, and I hoped he might play me once no matter how bad I am. Next I went to the book store picking up a few journals that were a present for Edward, but they would be filled with words from me. I knew he wanted to know what I was thinking, so I was going to write down somethings I thought since I met him. Although I wasn't going to spill my guts either I mean too much wouldn't be good. When Alice showed up outside of the bookstore I surrendered my bags without a word. Walking by Baby World I went in unable to pass it by, and I got a cart of all things not thinking of it. Making my way around I ended up with a white knitted baby blanket, a purple monkey, and the tiniest shoes I'd ever seen. Going up to the cashier I knew she was going to talk to me; which made me cringe not wanting to answer. "First pregnancy," she asked perky off the charts.

"I'm not," I mumbled as she scanned the items.

"Baby shower," she continued to question.

"No," I shook my head not going to volunteer anything.

"Thanks for picking those up for me," came Alice's voice as I turned to see her standing next to me.

"Oh, I'm Stacy," Stacy mumbled as I paid and Alice took the bags.

Following Alice out I was glad she came to the rescue cause what could I of said about it really? The whole story was sad when I heard it, and the last thing was looks of pity for Mercy.

Sitting in the food court after Alice had took my stuff to the car yet again. Two more gifts before I could leave cause I got Charlie's gift back a Forks months ago. Staring at my burger I was nervous about getting Rosalie a gift. Whatever I got her had to be perfect; especially since she hated my guts practically since day one. Asking Alice was out of the question if I want to gain some kind of ground with her.

"Eat that burger before it eats you," Alice eyed me with her arms folded.

Grabbing the burger I took a few bites for Alice; before shoving it away from me.

"Better," I asked yawning a little.

"Go get mine and Rose's gift. I'll meet you at the car," Alice relented as she stood up.

"I'm worried. She hates me," I apologized knowing I was cranky cause I was stress about Rosalie.

"Go with your gut," Alice wink as she left.

Having ideal I needed some help from my Aunt Fiona who is the black sheep on my mom's side. Pulling out my cell throwaway I dialed the newest number this week. "Anna," came my Aunt's voice on the other end.

"Fi, it's Bella," I smirked as I leaned back.

"Sis, what's up," Fiona asked carefully.

"I need a gift only you can get me. Something shiny sleek and for a strong woman," I explained carefully.

"I'll be passing through in about a week, so I'll see what I can do," Fiona replied before hanging up.

Standing to my feet I walked out into the mall which was getting more crowded by the minute. Tossing the phone in the fountain, and almost fell in myself if a pair of cold strong arms didn't catch me.

"Miss me," Came Edward voice from behind.

"She called you," I stated more than questioned.

"I was near by," Edward smiled as he turned me around.

"I got Rosalie covered. You're not the only one who has connections," I smirked as I kissed him.

"I hear I like your Aunt," Edward whispered in my ear.

"Alice," I grumbled knowing she'd told him.

"You're secret is safe. I took care of Alice for you," Edward handed me the bag. Looking inside it was perfect for Alice, and something I'd pick out myself.

He had gotten sister bracelets that had charms that linked together when close.

"Thank you," I whispered as he took me by the hand.

"Let's get you home," Edward said as we made our way out of the mall.

"No," I shook my head knowing I had one more stop.

"She'll be there in the morning," Edward reasoned worry in his eyes.

"I'm going to see her tonight. All day I've been waiting to see her," I stood my ground not about to budge on it.

"Alright," Edward frowned as he backed down finally.


	3. Chapter 3

When Alice finally got us back to town it was later than what I had thought, but I couldn't just go home not yet even if Charlie got mad. I knew Edward didn't get why I needed to go see her even if I might be turned away. We were a like Mercy and me... There wasn't a mom there to watch over me just like Mercy. No dad was there to kiss her good night just like Charlie. I knew what it was like to be alone in the world... Maybe foolishly I wanted to be there as long as I could no matter what happened.

"We're here," came Alice voice breaking into my thoughts.

"Thanks," I whispered grabbing my bag of goodies from the back.

Getting out I headed strait to the front door and went in passing the same woman from the day before. Heading for the elevators I took my time getting in and pressing for level three waiting for the doors to close. Taking a deep breath I wondered if I was setting myself up for heart break. This time it seemed like only seconds before the door were opening on the third floor. Stepping out of the elevator my legs seemed to have a mind of their own as they walked me to the NICU without hesitation. There he was waiting on me like I knew he would be.

"Please, I just want to sit with her. It's just a blanket, shoes, and a purple monkey," I pleaded with Carlisle in a desperate whisper.

"Ten minutes. Those have to be sterilized first," Carlisle reached out taking the bag.

"How is she?" I stammered as he put the code in.

"She's gain two ounces," Carlisle smiled slightly trying to not get my hopes up.

"One day," I swallowed hard as we walked into the NICU.

"That's all we can ask of her," Carlisle nodded as I took a seat next to her.

"Hey little one," I cooed as Carlisle excused himself. Part of me wanted to reach out to stroke her fine dirty blonde ringlets.

I could see where those tiny wisps of hair was curling into ringlet.

"It stinks when you have no one I get it. This might not be better, but I'll be around,"

As her body relax a little I took it as a sign she understood on some level. Leaning back in the rocking chair I hummed as I rocked back and forth the lullaby Edward wrote for me.

"Sometime life throws you this lousy hand that you don't deserve, but then sometimes you get something amazing you never expected either,"

Closing my eyes I wished I could tell her it would be okay; that there was better out there for her someday. The one thing I wanted to tell her I could cause I didn't know what tomorrow held for her. All I could do was hope for a better day for her tomorrow.

Feeling two cold arms around me it was different than how Edward held me. Opening my eyes a sliver I saw it was Carlisle, so I fell asleep at the hospital just great. They'd all be on my case about how I was taking on too much by doing this right now. They would gang up on me by morning I knew it; which made want to just groan that I was being treat like I was five. As Carlisle laid me down I notice it was a bunk bed, and not like my lumpy bed at Charlie's either.

"You're in the On-call Room," Carlisle stated fully aware I wasn't asleep. "I guess Alice is wait on me," I asked opening my eyes.

"No, We're snowed in at the hospital for at least the night. I called Charlie," Carlisle explained pulling out a trail mix sort of candy bar.

"Stuck, huh," I shrugged taking the candy bar being offered.

"The snow got bad after you got here really fast," Carlisle said as I sat up opening the wrapper and taking a few bites.

"What?" I asked seeing the look in his eyes.

"I'm sorry I left. Since we've been back I've let Edward take the heat... When you needed me the most I wasn't here," Carlisle apologized as he kissed my forehead lightly.

"I get it... You have to stand by the people you love," I shook my head knowing he had done what he had thought was best.

"I hurt everyone in the long run by giving in to Edward. We've never ran from anything, and yet I let it happen instead of stopping it. You deserved better from me," Carlisle frowned taking me by the hand.

"Charlie and Renee both have for most of my life left me on my own. Barely knowing me you took me in as one of your own. Any time I needed you there you were. I knew if I ever really needed you; you would find me where ever I was. What you did was out of love for me and the others. I love you like I would a real dad" I said slowly putting my arms around his neck hugging him.

"I love you too," Carlisle whispered as he kissed my forehead gently.

"Where's Alice?" I asked pulling back knowing she had been waiting on me.

"I sent her home just before the snow in. Charlie thinks I was going to give you a ride, but I figured you'd want to be stuck here instead of home," Carlisle guessed with a knowing smile.

"Nothing gets by Alice," I replied softly know why she didn't want me here because of the snow.

"Because you are so different she couldn't pin down how the next few days here would go. Preemies health go up and down like a yo-yo, and she wants to protect you," Carlisle whispered making me look him directly in the eye.

Standing to my feet I crossed the room to the window watching the snow fall outside faster by the minute. Everything was blanketed outside in a thick layer of snow, and it was almost magical enough to make me forget. Almost... There was this little nagging voice in the back of my head that wouldn't let me forget. It was the voice that reminded me of where I came from and what I had came through.

"Why does everyone think I can't handle it," I snapped not meaning to sound as harsh as I did.

"Although the others may disagree with me... I know you can. You need to be needed because that is who you are. Esme is the same way. You both give your whole heart to everything you do. A little dangerous sometimes for you. I won't lie... Your heart could get broken," Carlisle trailed off at the end.

Turning to look over my shoulder I could see the truth in his words.

"Isn't my heart to break," I questioned looking his way.

"Yes, it is. But the people who love you want to protect that heart of yours. They want to save you from any pain," Carlisle tried to explain their side.

"You," I inquired curious.

"You have to know when to step back and let go. If your heart breaks I'll be there to pick up the pieces because that is what a dad does for his child," Carlisle whispered softly as he folded his hands.

"I'm paying it forward," I mumbled turning back to the window.

"How so," Carlisle asked I could see his eyebrows knitted together in my mind the way he did when complexed.

Taking a deep breath I watched as the window pane fogged as it was hit with warm breath as I searched for the words.

"Mercy is just like me until you and Esme took me in. Alone in the world is a hard place to be day in and day out, and sometimes you just are waiting for it to be all over. I want better for her even if it's only for a little bit cause if she is taken than least someone loved her," I blinked as tears traced my cheeks.

Swallowing hard I wasn't too surprised to feel Carlisle come over and pulling me into a gentle had. Wiping at the tears I felt so stupid crying like some little kid. I don't know how long we stood there like that; I just cried as Carlisle hummed some tune I didn't know. When I started hiccuping my hands flew to my face in embarrassment, but Carlisle didn't move acting like it wasn't happening.

"Time to get some sleep," Carlisle spoke up as he lead me slowly to bottom bunk.

Yawning I didn't fight him as he had me lay down, and pulled a cover from off the top bunk putting it over me. Looking up at Carlisle one last time I closed my eyes know I was safe...

Waking alone in the On-call I pulled myself out of the bed, and got halfway presentable before heading down to NICU. The halls were that early morning silence before anyone is awake but you expect it a hospital not your home. Hearing the steps of my shoe against the floor there's almost this solace in the sound. Reaching the NICU door I half expected to find Carlisle waiting on me there. Pushing the call button wondered if I'd be let in this morning.

"Nurse Taylor, who do we got," came Nurse Taylor's voice over the intercom.

"Bella, from yesterday," I replied holding down the button.

"Let me buzz you in," Nurse Taylor said as the doors opened.

Going inside I was met by Nurse Taylor by Mercy's isolette. She looked bigger than last night if that was possible, and knew it really wasn't possible no matter how I'd like to believe it.

"What to hold her?" Nurse Taylor asked holding out a hospital gown.

"Please," I whispered as she put it on carefully, and then had me sit down in the rocker.

"Dr. Cullen put the blanket in this morning, and she's been resting a lot better," Nurse Taylor smiled as she picked up Mercy up.

Gently she laid Mercy in my arms wrapped in the white blanket I had bought her. For the first time I really saw all the wires that was connected to her little body.

"Can I help out around here?" I asked knowing they had to be short staffed.

"You're doing everything right here. I can handle everything else," Nurse Taylor replied softly.

"Please," I pleaded with her. Then she held out her finger leaving me alone with Mercy; returning a minute later with something between a bottle and a eyedropper.

"Feed her," Nurse Taylor encouraged forcing it into my hand.

"Um," I stuttered nervously.

"Place it on her bottom lip gently," Nurse Taylor instructed trying to reassure me.

Being as careful as could I did as told, and Mercy latched her tiny mouth slowly. Watching her eat it was very slow, but she was eat which was amazing to me. "Am I doing this right," I questioned unable to take my eye of Mercy.

"You're doing a great job," came Carlisle's voice making me look up to see him walking up and Nurse Taylor left me alone with him.

"Morning," I whispered as he knelt at my side.

"What's going on," Carlisle eyed me with those knowing eyes.

"I never noticed all the wires, and I am worried about her," I admitted looking down at her for a second before turning back to Carlisle.

"They're telling us when everything is going right or wrong. It can be overwhelming, but it helps her tell us what she needs. Right now she can't cry really," Carlisle explained carefully with me as if he was trying not to scare me.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: Read the note at the bottom after you read the chapter

As the days passed at the hospital I had adopted wearing extra scrubs as I spent most of my time in the NICU. Carlisle had pulled me down to the cafeteria to make sure I was eating right. This morning I was sitting on my bunk eating from a tupperware bowl which I believed was from Jasper. Gut feeling since it was make favorite Chili which Jasper made me every now and again.

"It was nice of Jasper to make the track up here," I mumble softly so only Carlisle would hear.

"Yes," Carlisle agreed with a nod.

Eating the food I wondered how Mercy was this morning; though it had only been hours since I had last seen her. Taking a few more bite I could see he was waiting for me to ask knowing I would.

"So," I asked eying him.

"She a little over two pounds which for two weeks old is really good," Carlisle smile a cautiously that warned me not to hope. "

Why do you look like you're waiting for the other shoe to drop?" I questioned being direct about it.

"She has a whole in her heart about the size of a pin prick and right know we are wait for it to close up like it should.

As long as it doesn't act up we can wait a little while longer till she is bigger and stronger," Carlisle frowned with a remorseful look in his eyes. Standing up I walked over to the trash to drop the rest of the chili in the can cause I couldn't eat anymore as anger fill my veins like fire. Gripping the bowl I threw it at the window with all my strength, but Carlisle zipped over catching it before it could make a mess. As sobs tore through my chest Carlisle put bowl down, and came pulling me into a gentle hug.

"I don't want to talk," I mumbled as I took a few steps back not about to breakdown again.

"Bella," Carlisle whispered as I wiped at the tears.

"No, I'm not doing this," I shook my head as I swallowed hard.

Holding up my hand I want into the bathroom locking the door behind me, and turned on the sink washing my face over with the water. After a minute I took a deep breath as I turned off the water. Grabbing a paper towel I dried off my face; then I looked at myself in the mirror trying to calm down.

"Bella," came Edward's voice from the other side of door.

Unlocking the door I went closing the lid on the toilet before sitting down.

"Hi," I mumbled putting my face in my hands embarrassed.

I could hear him walk over and kneel down in front of me.

"I'm sorry. You not completely breakable, and I should give you more credit and support," Edward apologized as he pulled my hands from my face.

Walking down the hall to NICU with Edward hand around my waist I felt better with him next to me. Merely his presence gave me a since of comfort that calmed my nerves like nothing else could. In the same stroke I figured the snow was melting at last which meant I would have to go home later today sometime. Shaking the thought from my brain I saw Carlisle holding the door open for us.

"Someone is waiting for her bottle," Carlisle smiled ushering us in the NICU.

As my feet lead the way I peered into the isolette Mercy look all of her two pounds.

"Edward, why don't you feed her," I suggested batting my eye trying to dazzle like he did to be so often.

I saw as he swallowed hard not crazy about the ideal.

"I'll take care of him," Nurse Taylor smirked as she grabbed a reluctant Edward dragging him off.

Stifling a laugh I clamped my hand over my mouth which didn't help much.

"It's good to see that smile," Carlisle said simply as he looked my way.

"He looks so not confident; which is so different for him," I replied looking down at Mercy.

"What to touch her," Carlisle asked making my eyes snap in his direction.

"Really?" I asked as the air caught in my throat.

"Yes," Carlisle answered as he went opening the port holes and stepping aside letting me take his place.

Gently I placed my hands through the holes being careful to move slowly. First I touched the blonde fuzz that was her hair; which felt like the softest thing I'd ever touched in my life. Moving my hand to her arms there was even thinner fuzz, but she was warmer than I expected her to be. It wasn't like she running a fever or something. She was warm... Lightly moving my finger to rest against her tiny chest just to feel her little heart beating.

"Is there any way out of this?" came Edward's voice causing me to withdraw my hands.

"No," I shook my head as I looked up at him.

Taking him by the hand I led him to the rocking chair. Watching him sit down I turned my head to see Carlisle holding Mercy in his hands. As Carlisle handed Mercy to Edward I could see him staring at her in awe.

"Not so bad," Edward mumbled as he look into those tiny eyes full of innocence.

She was damaged like I was from my parents yet. More than anything I wanted to protect her from those thing that hung over everything even now. Even as happy I was with Edward. When he left it was my greatest fear come true for the three year old inside me. I hadn't understood why Charlie had been gone when I was little because I didn't understand yet that Renee had left and not the other way around.

Seeing Edward feed Mercy her bottle I put all my insecurities aside just to enjoy this moment with the two most important people in my life right now. Chuckling I couldn't help it for the mere fact he looked like she would shatter right there in his arms. This was a side I had never really seen from him that made him look even more human which made me love him all the more.

"She's fine," I encouraged as I kissed him lightly on the lips.

"I think I get it. She is something amazing. Watching her I'm amazed at how strong she is. Carlisle is right; she's a fighter," Edward whispered softly as he glanced up at me.

"I know," I smiled slightly.

"Tell me what you're thinking," Edward asked knowing me too well.

"You don't want to hear this," I said before thinking.

"Please, I do," Edward pleaded as he dazzled me with his eyes.

"I wish we could keep her, so she could be ours forever," I admitted as my heart beat wildly in my chest.

"If we got married there could be a very good chance we'd be considered," Edward smirked like he had caught me.

Married... That scared me to death for many reasons; not to mention my own parents hadn't made it work. Yet at the same time I knew he wouldn't make the same mistake twice ever again. Then there was me, and I knew he was my heart. Looking around I noticed we were alone, and I grabbed the sticky note pad and pen out of my pocket.

"For until Alice has her big shindig wing-a-ding. No running or leaving," I answered writing on the stick note.

"No hiding," Edward added as I wrote it down.

"No secrets," I continued as added to the list.

"No more than twenty-four hours away from one another," Edward smiled as he watch Mercy eat.

"We make all decision together," I smiled up at Edward softly.

"You have the right to add to these vows whenever needed," Edward stipulated as Mercy finished off her bottle.

Signing the bottom I then held it for Edward, and he signed without even moving Mercy a little.

"I love you, Mr. Cullen," I smirked as I felt happier than I thought possible.

"I love you, Mrs. Cullen," Edward smiled from ear to ear.

Leaning down I kissed my husband, and then kissed the top of Mercy's head softly.

"Reach into my pocket on the left side," Edward instructed as his smile turned into a smirk.

Reaching in his pocket I grabbed a small square box out.

"Edward," I questioned still not liking him spending so much on me.

"It was my grandmother's on my dad's side. She bought them from some friends who were in need of money. Never having the chance to return them she pass them to me hoping I get use out of them," Edward explained speaking softly like he remembered the day.

Back at home I sat in my room looking at the rings on my hand, and I was waiting to fill weird about it somehow that would make me freak. All I could think is how Edward had insisted on taking our vows to be framed to be hung in our home after Alice planned us some big wedding. I guess all those thoughts swirling around in my head that I didn't hear my door open.

"What is that," came Charlie's voice making me snap back to reality.

"An engagement ring. Edward asked me and I accepted. We're not rushing to the alter just yet," I rattled off knowing he was bound to freak even if I hadn't.

Charlie took a deep breath as he came to sit next to me looking remorseful.

"I wasn't there like I should of been, and I don't have the right to stop you. Grounding you was a stretch since you are legal that is," Charlie mumbled as he looked at the floor defeated.

"I'll always love you, dad. This isn't me kicking you out of my life; I'm just learning to live my life the best I can. Sometime long ago I was kicked out of the nest, and learned to fend for myself with out you or mom. It made me who I am today. Thinking things through are first nature to me, and I wouldn't trade a moment of it for anything. I'm here today for the simple fact you and mom made the choices you did. The time has come for me to make my own mistakes, but I know this isn't a mistake not for me. I love him more than I thought possible," I tried to explain where I was coming from with out choking the word dad.

"Long time ago I knew that feeling, but I cut it off after everything. I guess I've been trying to save you from the hurt I went through," Charlie whispered glancing up at me.

"Maybe it's time for you to open up your heart again," I suggested taking him by the hand and squeezing gently.

"You're not grounded," Charlie relented as he stood up.

"How about I cook those steaks in the fridge?" I smiled as I got up from the bed.

"Sounds good," Charlie said leaving the room.

Glancing at myself in my mirror I looked different some how, and I couldn't put my finger on what it was. Heading downstairs I went to the kitchen grabbing a bowl, and went to putting a little of this and that to make a quick marinade for the steaks. Hearing the phone ring I rushed to the wall phone grabbing it.

"Hello, this is Bella," I bubbly almost as I was very happy.

"Bella, it's Carlisle," Carlisle spoke sound strange even for him.

"Carlisle, what's up," I asked as I felt my heart pounding in my chest.

Hearing the words the phone slide out of my hand crashing to the floor with a thud.

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*Check my profile to find the ring picture links*

Yes, I kind of ripped off Grey's Anatomy Post it wedding thing for any Grey's Fans who notice, but for those you who have no ideal what I'm talking about ignore this note.


	5. Chapter 5

Walking the floor of the waiting room I felt like I was going to throw-up at any second. I trusted Carlisle completely to fix her heart, and to bring her back to me really soon. Still I could feel this cloud hanging over my head, and then there was Edward who was boring worried glances into me. Hearing the clicks of high heels I looked up to see Esme standing in the door way.

"Mommy," I barely whispered as I ran to her.

Gently she wrapped her arms around me holding me close.

"Shhh, it's okay," Esme cooed into my ear.

"I'm scared," I mumbled as the tears traced my face.

"I know. Let's take a walk," Esme nodded as she led me out of the room.

Not about to argue with Esme, so I let her led me through the hospital. My heart pounded in my ears as got further and further from the waiting room and those double doors where Mercy was. When Esme finally stopped I saw we were outside the cafeteria; which was the last thing I expected with everything going on.

"I can't," I shook my head not wanting to eat.

Taking me by the hand Esme led me inside, and grabbed a tray with her free hand. Quickly she loaded it up with stuff to eat, and payed for it all before leading to a table. "Sit," Esme commanded making me sit with out another word. Gracefully she took her seat next to me, and we just there not saying anything. For sure I knew she would expect me to eat something sooner or later. Grabbing the apple of the tray I rolled it back and forth between my hands not ready to eat just yet. All I could think was Mercy was in surgery; this small helpless little baby on a cold table.

"I can't lose her," I broke down into sobs not caring who saw.

"Being a mama is hard when you can't fix it," Esme whispered as she took me by the hand.

"How can I love her so much already? I need her and she needs me," I stammered through the sobs.

"They steal your heart before you know it. Sometimes you don't even realize it until you're hooked," Esme explained softly.

"Please don't let me lose her," I choked out as Esme pulled me into her embrace.

"Shhhh... We are going to wait for Carlisle, and he is going let us know soon," Esme tried to soothe me.

Hiding my face in her shirt like a little kid; I wanted to just disappear right then and there. I don't know how long we stayed like that until Esme moved quickly being replace. Glancing up I was surprised to see Jasper there holding me gently.

"Alice sent me with this," Jasper said holding a drawing of a girl maybe six or seven years old.

"What is," I hiccuped taking the photo from him. "Mercy in the future," Jasper smiled warmly as he held me.

Staring at the picture I was amazed as I could really see it now. From Mercy's piercing ice blue eyes to her shape of her cute little nose. This was what I had to look forward to in the future right now... This was tangible proof that that she was going to make it through this hurdle. Breathing a sigh of relief I wiped at the tears covering my face; which was a little embarrassing now that I knew it was going to be okay.

"Thanks for bringing this to me; I needed it a lot you don't even know," I stammered as I sat up.

"Mercy is one lucky kid right now. Eight people are camped out rooting for her, and one more who is personally was watching over her," Jasper encouraged as he let me have my space.

"I know it's not easy being here," I apologized without thinking.

"After everything I owe you for wanting me here at all," Jasper mumbled remorsefully.

"You my family just like the rest. I need you here with me cause I couldn't do this without you," I shook my head in disagreement with him.

"If Mercy grows into half the woman you are she'll be amazing," Jasper said ever the southern gentleman that I expected.

"It's kind of scary thinking of me as a mom to anyone," I admitted bashfully.

"You'll make a great mom cause you love without holding back anything. Apart from Esme my mother; I don't know anyone like that. Some people are made to be taken care of, and others are made to take care of others. If you're lucky like you and Edward; then both get to take care of each other," Jasper spoke with a serious tone to his voice.

"Thanks," I mumbled as I picked up the apple taking a few bites.

"Let me warm that burger for you," Jasper changed the subject as he stood taking the burger with him.

"Thanks" I nodded slightly as he left me there.

Yawning I knew that my sleep deprivation was catching up with my body finally after... Looking up at the clock it was nearing nine in the morning; which meant I had been here fourteen hours. Rubbing my eyes I wondered what was going on in the surgery now. Although I didn't want to think it Edward was right; that the future was never set in stone that never changed. Until I saw her for myself I wouldn't be able to sha0ke this lingering grain of doubt in my head.

"Burger," Jasper broke my thoughts as he place the burger in front of me.

Taking a few bites I yawned again as I fought to stay awake until Carlisle came with word.

"This is really good," I licked my lips as I took a few more bites.

"Wow, you really need to sleep," Jasper chuckled as he shook his head.

Glaring at him defiantly I put my head down to rest my eyes for just a minute.

Feeling a hand gently shaking my arm I jerked awake sitting up to see Carlisle at my side. I was excited to see him finally after all the waiting, but I was still nervous about what he would tell me. Edward was right the future isn't set in stone even with Alice, so there was no telling what the future look like now. Swallowing I tried to keep myself calm enough to hear Carlisle.

"She is doing really good right now. There are a more lot of wires right now just to be careful, but I'm hoping to see her going home in a month or two at the most," Carlisle smiled warmly at me.

"Can I see her?" I stammered getting to my feet.

"Edward is with her, and they're both waiting for you," Carlisle replied as he pulled me into a hug.

"Let's go," I bubbled as we started walking toward the doors of the cafeteria.

Walking down the halls I was glad to be able to see her even if she was hooked up to a whole lot of machines.

"Listen she's getting help breathing just for a little bit. This is what we do for all babies with this surgery; it just takes some pressure off the heart while it heals," Carlisle tried to warn me as we made it to the NICU in record time for a human pace.

"Alright," I nodded just wanting to see her.

As we got into the NICU Carlisle took me to the room where I went the first day. We both washed our hands, and Nurse Taylor helped us with gowns and masks this time. The mask were new for me... I had never had to wear them before to see Mercy, but I guess germs were a lot more scarier. I didn't care as long as I could see her, and know she had made it through this hurdle. Following Carlisle through NICU I found Mercy had her own little room this time with a bed next to the window for someone to stay. I had a feeling Carlisle had made these commendations possible knowing me all too well. Seeing Edward there dressed up just like me, and went to stand by him looking down on Mercy sleeping.

"She looks so small," I stammered fighting back the tears.

"But she's going to make it," Edward whispered in my ear.

Nodding I blinked back the tears threatening to fall.

"We'll be here for her every step of the way," Edward said as he gave me an eskimo kiss.

Do I have the best guy or what? Standing there with the man I love, and being able to see Mercy was okay was all I needed for now.

"I want to take my G.E.D. And be done with school. This is where I need to be," I whispered as I looked Edward in the eye being serious.

"I'm here to support you, so whatever you want," Edward said softly backing me up.

Heading back to the waiting room to let everyone know what was going on; I wondered what Charlie was going to say about me getting G.E.D. instead of a regular diploma. At least I had Edward at my side to tell him this, and knew the others would back me up. I hoped... I think... Walking into the room where I was surround my all the Cullens, Charlie, Jacob and Billy; I hadn't expected to see either Jacob or Billy after everything.

"Mercy is doing good right now. Carlisle is looking for her to keep improving. It's going to be a long hard road to being released from the hospital. Right now I want to be here for Mercy, so I'm going to get my G.E.D. soon as I can. I want to be here as much as possible to see Mercy through this," I stated rather than questioned looking to Charlie.

"Always knew you were biding your time in that school. Plus your legal making it your choice not mine," Charlie relented not fighting me.

"Carlisle set up a cot for me in her room, so I'll go get some clothes. I want to be here for tonight at least," I explained my plan at least for the night.

Jacob was shifting uncomfortably long with Billy who didn't like present company of the Cullens.

"Could I see you in private," Jacob asked controlling his voice completely.

"Sure," I shrugged leading the way out of the room, and down the hall a little ways.

Turning around I crossed my arms without thinking about it; I looked him in the eye not thrilled to be out here.

"This is dangerous," Jacob whispered eying me like I had lost my mind.

"You don't get to make my mind up for me," I snapped in a low voice.

"What is that," He questioned seeing my rings.

"An engagement ring," I said not about to explain.

"He can never give you a real marriage with everything that entails," Jacob spat at me through clenched teeth.

"It's time for you to go," Edward ordered as he appeared at my side and wrapped his arm around my waist protectively.

"You'll do well to remember the rules," Jacob growled before stomping off.

Leaning into Edward's embrace we walked back to the waiting room; where as soon as we entered Billy left the room.

"Where's Alice and Jasper," I asked as I noticed her gone.

"She went to get some food for everyone," Carlisle spoke up as he locked eyes with Edward.

I knew there was something he wasn't telling me to, and it was outside of the hospital. Also he had left off Jasper who I had asked about too; which couldn't be anything good that was for sure. Then it hit me who was in town and got everyone's buns in a twist.

"We need to talk now," I whispered into Edward's ear as I fake fainted on the spot.


	6. Chapter 6

When I felt Edward lay me down on a bed I opened my eyes to Carlisle and Edward standing next to me. Sitting up I grabbed a pen and paper out of the drawer of the room. Writing the address of the drop and the safe word that would get my substitute the gift for Rose. Man, I really need to think things through a little more. I didn't see this happening at all, and I knew I should of warned then.

"Okay, she my aunt on my mom's side. She's the black sheep of the family. Anyways I'm sure you know all you could about her. The thing is I brought her here because she can get me the perfect gift for Rose. Plus it doesn't hurt that she'd do anything for me. Give this to Alice, and Fiona will hand it over," I rattled off as fast as I could, and held out the paper.

"You brought a spy/arms dealer to town," Carlisle questioned in disbelief.

"Sort of... Yeah... This was only a drop off for me... Her daughter Lizzie is about to graduate for boarding school, so she's not staying in country at all," I went on to explain why it wasn't as bad as it looked.

"I will take this to Alice, and no more surprises," Edward pleaded with me.

"I promise no more bringing my aunt through town without talking to you about it," I smiled knowing he wasn't too mad now.

"How long do I have to hide," I asked as Edward left the room.

"A gun," Carlisle stated more than asked me right out.

"I'm not sure what kind... Kind of left it up to my aunt... She's a collector," I shrugged a little embarrassed about being caught.

"I'm going to give you a banana bag; your magnesium is a little lower than I'd like. Probably from not taking great care of yourself lately. That will have to change," Carlisle said as took my hand finding a vein and putting the iv in before I felt it.

"How long," I asked looking up at the iv bag at my bed side.

"When it's done... Plus it will give you time to think about; making sure at least I know what's going on," Carlisle eyed me not looking too happy with me.

"I didn't think it would be something that important. If it was anyone other than my aunt I would of spoken up. Fiona is the only other person than the family I trust with my life," I tried to defend myself.

"You wanted to empress Rose. The only thing that wasn't made up in your head was you didn't think. Being on the outs with Rose stinks, but you can't allow it to cloud your judgment," Carlisle reprimanded me not letting up on me.

"I love you always,"

Glancing up I hadn't expected to hear that right now.

Staring at the drip after Carlisle left; I knew he was right I shouldn't of brought Fi here. Thinking about it I knew bringing her was selfish too... Four years to the day since the last time I had seen her, and I wanted just to be in the same area somewhat. Out there somewhere Fi had a whole life that I would never be a part of, and she had a family I'd never met in my life time ever. It was my last chance to have one last contact with her before she disappear for maybe forever this time. Hearing a knock I looked up to see Emmett come in the room...

"How you feeling," Emmett questioned looking worried.

"I'm fine just in trouble," I shrugged glad to have the company.

"Perfect little Bella did something," Emmett teased making his eyes go wide.

"Yeah, I did," I frowned feeling guilty.

"Come on, it can't be that bad. Carlisle doesn't seem that mad when I just saw him," Emmett tried to reassure me.

"He looked pretty mad when he left here," I replied lamely.

"That's because it takes him by surprise when you do wrong. Plus he figures it'll take one stern look to straiten you out... Unlike me who he has to beat it into my head," Emmett chuckled a little like he'd see Carlisle in action once too many time and knew all the tricks.

"Thanks for hanging out here, but I bet Rosalie is looking for you," I mumbled not wanting to be in any trouble with her either.

"Carlisle let her see Mercy, so she is totally occupied at the moment. She's a little worried about you... Although she'd never admit to it ever. I think after Italy she changed her mind, but don't expect to hear it from her," Emmett pulled a chair up to the bed sitting on it backwards.

"I'm not telling you what I got you," I changed the subject knowing he wanted to know.

"Come on," Emmett pouted folding his arms like he is three years old.

"Not a chance," I shook my head trying not to laugh.

"You'll be my favorite sister," he countered eying me carefully.

"I think I already am," I guessed chuckling lightly.

"Fine, you got me there, but come on please," Emmett said as he made his best puppy face.

"No.. No.. No and no..." I shook with laughter unable to help it cause Emmett looked so funny.

"Don't you love me anymore," Emmett frown giving one last ditch effort.

"You know I do, but I'm not telling," I replied standing my ground.

"Fine," Emmett relented not looking happy.

"How about I tell you what I got Alice? She not allowed to look to see what I got her," I countered knowing he'd love to hold it over her.

"Tell me! Tell me! Tell me..." Emmett nodded excitedly.

Pulling the iv out of my hand I flinched a little cause it did sting a bit coming out. There was no way I was leaving it in there any longer than it had to be in there. Also I wanted to get back to Mercy's side as soon as possible because she needed me there with her. Getting off the bed I looked to see Carlisle coming the door as I got there; he held out his hand to me waiting on me. Taking his hand I watched as he band-aided my hand where the iv had been.

"How's she doing?" I asked more than a little curious.

"Fine, just fine. Sit back down," Carlisle ordered pointing to the bed.

"Carlisle," I begged not wanting to wait.

"You have to eat," Carlisle shook his head as I noticed the bag he was carrying.

Sitting back down I watched as Carlisle pulled the desk like thing over to me, and took out a burger, fries, salad and a shake putting them on it.

"I don't think I can eat all that," I bugged a little knowing my stomach wouldn't hold it all.

"Eat as much as you can cause you need to be healthy. That little girl need you to be your best," Carlisle reminded me gently.

Grabbing the burger I take a few bites knowing he is right.

"I'm sorry for the trouble. Is Abby," I trail off not sure I want to know.

"Abby made it to the bus stop, and got the package easily. She's with Edward and Mercy right now," Carlisle pushed the salad close to me.

"Sorry," I mumbled as I took a few bites of salad.

"We're okay. Just as long as you don't follow after Emmett," Carlisle joked with me.

Smiling I was glad he wasn't still mad at me because it was the worst feeling in the world. Besides the fact he was the closest thing I had to a real dad; he had done a lot for me since I met him.

"Thanks for the food," I said as I picked up the shake taking a long drink.

Mmmm strawberry my favorite...

"What you thinking about?" he asked seeing the change in my face.

"Just wanting to hold Mercy, and let her know I'm here for her," I whispered staring at the cup.

"Give it a few days, and you'll be holding her while feeding her," Carlisle promised as he reached out taking me by the hand.

"Think so," I questioned hopeful.

"Know so," Carlisle encouraged with a slight nodded.

"Lets see if I can make a little more of a dent into this food," I smirked a little knowing I had to tried to eat more.

"Look at this first," Carlisle replied pulling out his phone showing my pictures of Mercy.

Seeing her was exactly what I need to see, and felt myself let go of a breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

Standing over Mercy's bed I was glad to see her finally after being away from her for hours. It felt like it had been days not hours to me. Feeling Edward's arms around my waist from behind I leaned back into his embrace enjoying him being here with me. There was something comforting that I could never put my finger on because he never really had to try hard to comfort me ever. He also knew when to let me just be on my own; even if he couldn't read my mind he knew me.

"I never thought I could love someone as much as I love you," Edward whispered into to my ear.

"I know what you mean. Loving you with everything I had, but then it was like my heart to make just as much room for you," I smiled looking up at him.

"More than anything I just want to protect her," Edward said as he kissed the top of my head.

"You're going to be a great dad. I want her first word to be da da because I just want to see what you do," I laughed a little at the thought.

"Nah, she'll say ma ma," Edward shook his head smirking.

"It's late," I say grabbing his hand to get a look at his watch.

Eleven thirty is staring me in the face, but I don't want to leave.

"Come home with me, and we'll come back in the morning. Esme will stay with her," Edward suggested as he kissed my neck making it hard to think.

"That is so not fair," I breathed getting more and more breathless.

"How so," Edward asked as he continued to kiss my ear.

"You won't finish that thought," I gasped feeling my temperature rising.

"I'm a married man now. Jasper picked up the papers that say so today," Edward whispered in my ear.

"You're not messing with me," I questioned knowing he most likely would pull away like always.

"You're not the only one who wants a wedding night. There is an empty house that is waiting for us," Edward replied raising his eyebrows.

"Let's go," I gave in as I let him lead me to discard the hospital gowns.

As we made our way out of the hospital I half expected to wake up next to Mercy at any minute. He was always so over protective with me, so I wasn't sure what had gotten into him today. I didn't care what it was I just hoped that he'd relax a little more often. Getting into his Volvo I watch him shut my door, and before I blinked he was in the driver's seat pulling out on the road. Even his speeding didn't bother me like it normally did cause I just wanted to get to his house. Before I knew it we were pulled in front of his house, and he was out of the car opening my door. Giggling I let him scoop me up in his arms, and hid my face in his chest as blurred into the house to his room. Gently he laid me down into his bed looking at me like I had never been looked at before.


	7. Chapter 7

A part of me wants to just stay in this bed all day, and remember every single touch from last night. Even now his scent lingers in the air like nothing before. If everything could come to a standstill while I just lived in this moment forever. Over the years I had heard what it's like... Yet nothing I had prepared me for how amazing it was to be with the man I loved. Blushing I could feel his arm wrapped around my waist.

"Morning," Edward whispered as he kissed my forehead.

"Tell last night wasn't a dream," I pleaded afraid it was.

"No, it was no dream," Edward smirked I could hear it in his voice.

"When you get a bed," I asked a little confused.

"Esme had insisted that I'd have to drag you home at least once to get some proper rest," Edward explained softly.

"I don't think she had this in mind," I smiled snuggling close to him.

"No, I doubt a broken bed would be," Edward agreed getting my attention.

Opening my eyes I noticed the bed was sitting on the floor as the frame was broken in pieces.

"Wow, I can't believe I didn't," I trailed off as I caught sight of a few ripped pillows.

Feathers were everywhere.

"I know," Edward replied as sat up.

Reaching up to run my hands through my hair I pulled a hand full of feathers making Edward chuckle.

"You got a few of your own," I laughed as I sat up holding the covers over me.

"Let me," Edward held up is finger and he was gone in a blur.

When he got back he was in a robe and had one for me which I put on quickly.

"I'm starving," I mumbled as my stomach made it's presence known.

"Can't escape being human," Edward shook his head as he took me by the hand.

"I can't go down there like this," I complained knowing the others had to be home by now.

"It's just us," Edward informed me as he opened the door.

Letting him lead me downstairs I waited for Emmett to jump out or something. After we get to the kitchen there is a spread of fruit, bacon, eggs, sausage links, biscuits, and pancakes on the kitchen table.

"Wow," I breathed as Edward lead me to the table having me sit down.

"Esme went a little over board," Edward answered the question before I could ask.

"I'll have to thank her," I replied as Edward picked up a grape and fed it to me.

Taking a sausage link wrapping it in a pancake Edward put it to my lips. Enjoying the attention I took a few bites before getting thirsty. To my left I found a glass of milk which I picked up taking a big gulp. Turning back I finished of the sausage wrapped in a pancake.

Sitting in the car I was glad to go see Mercy cause she along with Edward were my world in every way. After breakfast my head had came down from the clouds, and I had gotten ready as did Edward to head back to the hospital to see our girl. Glancing down at our hands I loved the feel of here hands laced together today. There was something different about it today than before; I could put my finger on what it was I just felt it. As he pulled my hand up slowly I turned my attention to his face as he put my hand to his lips gently.

"We here," Edward whispered as he pulled into the parking spot.

"Thank you," I smiled as I leaned across to brush my lips against.

Pulling apart I got out going to the front of the car; as Edward followed behind me a minute later. Taking him by the hand we headed inside the hospital I'm almost sure people were staring at us. In my gut I knew they knew that we were married for real and much more some how.

"They don't know," Edward whispered in my ear as we entered the elevator.

"What about the stares," I countered under my breathe.

"You look happy and glowing. Plus that dress is beautiful on you," Edward mumbled as the doors closed as he pushed the button, and all the same pulling me close.

"It's nice without being too over the top I guess," I admitted as his lips planted gentle kisses on my neck.

"Alice will be pleased; you'll never hear the end of it," Edward chuckled as he pulled back just as the doors opened again.

Walking out of the elevator I was glad to see Carlisle waiting for us, but then my mind went to that dark twisty place of bad things that could happen.

"Mercy is doing great... We took her off the extra oxygen this morning. I just wanted to see you two," Carlisle said knowing me all too well.

Coming back down I let go of Edward, and went over to Carlisle hugging tight.

"Thanks," I smiled standing up on my tipy-toes to kiss his cheek.

Dealing with me can't be easy I know... Crazy worriers runs on my mom's side of the family.

"Let's get yo into to see that beautiful little girl," Carlisle spoke knowing I was dying to see her.

"Please," I nodded in agreement with him.

"Don't forget me," Edward teased standing next to me holding out his hand.

"Never going to happen ever," I shook my head know it was impossible to forget Edward ever.

Placing my hand in his I felt like I could do anything with Edward cause he would protect me and Mercy both. I never felt more ready to be married and somebody's mom; when I expected to flip out about both with full on panic attacks. They would be thanks to Renee who had warned me my whole life.

Reaching in the isolette I watch as Mercy wrapped her little finger around my pinky. Her fingers were still so small and long I couldn't believe it. Even though I knew she was getting bigger everyday; she still looked really small to me as I watched her breathe. With everything within me I wanted to pick her up holding her close to me, and gently place kisses on the top of her head.

"Bella," came Edward's voice catching my attention.

"Huh," I mumbled as I didn't look his way.

"Come sit with me for a minute," Edward asked softly.

Looking up Nurse Taylor was standing near by with patience in her eyes.

"Okay," I nodded as I moved back.

As Edward sat in the rocker he pulled me into his lap wrapping his arms around me being careful.

"Esme and Carlisle is giving us a cottage close to the main house as a wedding gift to us. I know you want to be here, so Alice is going to sit down with you when you eat. Even if you're here I want you in this, so we can make this place a home," Edward smiled down at me.

"Our own home... Wow, I can't believe it. A nursery for Mercy," I barely spoke the words under my breath.

"She'd be next door to us, and we have a door connecting us," Edward nodded slightly.

"We have to tell Charlie that we're married," I whispered a little worried.

"Don't worry I'm bullet proof,"Edward smirked as spoke so low only I'd hear.

"Good to know," I sighed as I laid my head against his chest.

"I never really thought about being a dad until you brought Mercy into my life," Edward smiled my crooked smile I loved.

"Maybe she was the reason for all this. Someone knew she needed two strong parents on her side to fight for her," I mused as I looked towards the isolette.

"I don't know... All I do know is that I want this family with everything I am," Edward spoke in a tone of reflection and amazement I'd never heard before.

Letting the silence linger between us; I wondered if I was hoping for too much. Would some stranger let two eighteen year old newly weds adopt a baby? What would it take for them to believe we were the best for Mercy? I don't think I could take losing her to another family...

"We'll get her,"

Nodding I had to believe he was right cause I couldn't not believe it. The three of us belong together like those mixed catch sets that just work for no real reason. You never question that they belong; they just don't look right except together. That was Edward, Mercy, and me... I was the plain jane if there ever was one. Edward was perfection to me, and Mercy was everything sweet and precious. Somehow we fix...

Seated in Edward's lap I picked at my apple knowing I wouldn't be leaving until I ate. Plus they were trying to distract me while Mercy had to have a few test. Alice and Edward both were on babysitting Bella because I might of got a little upset when a nurse took blood. For one I didn't know her at all... Or maybe I was too tired that's possible I guess... Mercy got her crying, and hearing her cry from the needle startled me. Carlisle had told me I wasn't allowed back for an hour, and I had to eat all my food I was gotten.

"Eat up," Alice encouraged bubbly.

"I just got this knot in my stomach," I grumbled glancing toward the door.

"Carlisle will check in later with news," Edward said as he kissed my cheek.

"I ate my salad," I countered as I spun the apple on the table. "

Apple and a little more milk," Alice smirked knowing I wasn't a big eater.

"Is there something I should know," I asked feeling like something was up.

"No," Alice answered to quick.

"Yes, there is," I challenged knowing I was right.

"Alice," Edward growled under his breath.

"Come on tell me, or I go find Carlisle now," I said folding my arms.

"Eat your apple, and I'll tell you," Edward countered eying me.

"Fine," I agreed as I started to nibble away.

"Carlisle is very pleased by Mercy's improvement by being held by you. The connection is strong between the two of of you that he want to step it up. He wants to see if you'd consider getting a shot to induce lactation to feed Mercy. This would help her gain more weight, and provided her with antibodies that she would of gotten," Edward trailed off at the end as he kept his eyes on me.

"When would he," I asked calmly.

"You'd get the shot today, and it would be a few days before... He'd try to see if she'd latch on, and if not you'd pump until she could," Edward explained still not breaking eye contact.

"Let's do it," I nodded knowing I wanted to help Mercy anyway I could even if involved...

Needles...

Fighting back the urge to shutter I knew I couldn't show weakness... Finishing the apple I down the milk know I had to eat better if I was doing this. Mercy need to keep growing bigger and stronger every day, so she could come home soon with me and Edward.

"More milk," I smiled as I picked up my glass holding it out to Alice.

"I think I can do that," Alice squealed in delight and glided out her chair.

"Christmas is going to be here in a couple days. Seems like months ago I went shopping... I wish Mercy could be home for Christmas with all of us," I mumbled as a tears slid down my face at the thought.


	8. Chapter 8

Picture links on profile

Fidgeting on the couch in Carlisle's office I waited for Jasper to join me there for his gift. Holding the gift in my hands I could feel my heart pounding inside my chest cause I still was worried I got it all wrong this Christmas. Hearing the door handle turning I looked up to see Jasper walking through the door, and then I felt calming waves washing over me taking my nerves down a couple of notches.

"Hi," I whispered as he sat down next to me.

"Maybe I should go," Jasper suggested ever the gentleman.

"No, I got this for you," I disagree holding out the wrapped gift.

It seemed like it took forever for him to unwrap, and open the memory box. Watching him look through it I held my breath waiting for his reaction.

"Thank you, and breathe," Jasper said noticing me not breathing.

"You like it," I asked after taking a deep breath.

"It's perfect...," Jasper smiled slightly my way.

"I'm glad... It wasn't an easy find," I admitted my relief under my breath.

"Could you send in Alice for me please," I asked knowing Jasper was a private person and the moment was over.

With a silent nod Jasper left me in the room, and Alice was in right behind him like she had been waiting. Dancing across the room Alice took a seat next to me; as she bounced up and down bubbly as ever. Pulling the wrapped gift box I knew I had to thank Edward for wrapping most of my gifts for me.

"For me," Alice smirked as I offered the box.

"Yes," I said as she unwrapped the gift.

"To: my sister and my best friend. You are the strength when I am weak, and accomplice when I am up to something," Alice read the inscription.

"I love you," I teared up as I showed Alice mine and how the linked together forever connecting us where ever we went.

"Perfect cause I love you," Alice smirked pulling me into a hug.

"Thanks for being my sister," I whispered in her ear.

"I better go get Emmett before Esme loses her well composed cool," Alice replied flitting away to the door and disappearing behind.

Grabbing the box for Emmett as he came bounding through the door like a five year old.

"Me next! Me next! Me me me me me me," Emmett pleaded making his eyes as big as he could trying to look like a puppy.

"Here you go," I laughed as held the box out to him. True to character Emmett tore into it, and his eyes got even bigger if that's possible.

"PS4, Grand Theft Auto 5, and Call of Duty: Black Ops II," Emmett said in complete awe.

"You like," I asked smiling ear to ear.

"You're the best sister ever," Emmett nodded as he sat the box down and came giving me a gentle hug.

Waiting for Esme out back in her greenhouse I was nervous about what she'd think about it. I loved the collection she had that filled this place even with snow outside. She had a way of pulling beauty from everything around her all the time; it was the mother in her that was responsible. Hearing the door open I sat there knowing she'd find me without even having to try.

"Bella, it's beautiful," Esme smiled gently as she came into view.

"I'm glad," I whispered as Esme took a seat next to me.

"I know the family got something for you together. My mother gave me this when I got married, and I want you to have it," Esme whispered as she pulled out a thin velvet jewelery box holding it out to me.

Slipping my fingers around it I took it, and gently opened the box to finding a necklace inside. It looked like a butterfly wing with small pears and diamonds hanging on a simple silver chain.

"Esme," I breathed speechless as I looked up at her.

"You are my daughter in every way that counts, and I'm so glad you and Edward are married," Esme replied as she kissed my forehead gently.

"Would you," I asked holding out the box.

"Of course," Esme answered taking the necklace out of the box.

Pulling my hair off my neck I held still as she put the necklace on for me.

"Thanks," I said as she sat back.

"Let's get back to the house," Esme suggested as she got up and helped me to my feet.

Dusting my jeans off I followed Esme back to the house, and went inside where Edward was waiting on me.

"Rose is in the living room," Edward motioned as he handed me her gift.

"Thanks," I whispered as I took the gift.

Taking a deep breath I headed to the living room to find Rosalie sitting on the couch looking uncomfortable. Shaking the nerves I went over taking a seat next to her, and held out the gift to her as she stared at it like a bomb almost.

"After everything," Rosalie questioned looking at the gift and then at me going back and forth.

"I had just as much to do with what happened. That day I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing, and everything else followed that one mistake. Let's just let all of us off the hook," I recommended as I reached out my hand taking hers in mine.

"Thanks," Rosalie smiled slightly nodding.

"Take this then," I encouraged putting the box on her lap.

Watching her open the box I wondered what Fi had chosen.

"No, it's a ALLEN & WHEELOCK LIPFIRE REVOLVER," Rosalie spoke in amazement as she lifted the gun from the box.

"I did good," I asked a little excited.

"This is the best. We'll have to go to a shooting range," Rosalie smirked as she checked out the gun.

Putting the last piece of the chess set on the board I hoped the coffee table was okay. Carlisle could always move it somewhere if need be. It was heavier than I remembered, but he could lift the whole thing with ease. This summer before he had left we had spent a few playing chess, and I was worried I might end up breaking his glass one someday with my track record. This was a good sturdy set that I was less likely to break no matter how klutzy I was. "Bella," Came Carlisle's voice making me look up to see him standing across from me.

"Merry Christmas," I smiled as looked from the Chess set to Carlisle.

"Thank you," Carlisle said as he came and pulled me into a hug gently.

"I've been thinking I want to become a NICU Doctor. Yes, I'll have to get over the blood thing, but I'll have a lot of time for that," I smiled proudly.

"I'd be honored to have my daughter in medicine. Have you and Edward talked," Carlisle trailed off at the end.

"We did when we got back a little. There is a few years yet. I'd like Mercy to be two or three, so she can be in a health," I explained the best I could.

"Looks like you've really thought it through," Carlisle replied looking me in the eye.

"Still am... Better send Edward in before I start tearing up from all this Christmas going on," I laughed a little so I wouldn't start crying.

"I'll do that," Carlisle said kissing my forehead gently.

As I watched Carlisle leave I sat back down wiping at the tears in my eyes. Stupid tears... Picking up the journals I wondered if I really wanted to do this. Within these pages were my thoughts written down for him to see. I knew it was the perfect gift for him because it was the only thing I could give him really. Hearing the door opening I looked up to see my Edward coming my way.

"It's been too long since I last saw you," Edward smiled his crooked smile.

"I agree," I said as he gently kissed me and took a seat next to me.

"What you got there," Edward asked looking at the journals.

"Something you always wanted. They are my thoughts written down for you to see," I stammered gripping the journals tight.

"You don't have to," Edward whispered eying me.

"I want to let you all in cause you are the man I love. Maybe I do edit myself sometime, but this is unedited completely," I explained as I handed him the journals.

"Thank you," Edward said as he kissed me again.

"I thought you'd be breaking them open the second I handed them over," I admitted blushing a deep red.

"We got to go see your gift," Edward countered eying me.

Blindfolded and being carried by Edward somewhere I wondered what was going on. Alice had insisted that this was a big surprise for me. For a moment I mind went to the millions of questions that Alice had thrown at me for the last few days before today. After what seem like only minutes I felt my feet return to the grown; while snow crunched under my new black boots courtesy of Alice.

"Turn her a little to the left," Came Alice's voice from in front of me.

"Spin her," Emmett joked from somewhere to my left.

"No, don't spin me at all," I objected to the ideal that would make me sick to my stomach.

"She's fine... I'm taking off the blindfold," Edward replied as he untied the blindfold pulling it away.

Seeing the cottage I stared in amazement of the house before me; that was just right for the three of us to grow into as a family. Edward handed me a key which I took... Walking up to the house I unlocked the front door flipping on the lights walking into the living room to my right. It was everything I could want from the fire place to nice couch and chair that wasn't over the top. Seeing the book shelve built into the wall the separated the living room and the dining room I loved it. The simple lighting was just my style, and a few lamps I'd enjoy reading by at night. Feeling Edward take my hand I let him lead me through the house to the kitchen which was small with a country style I loved it. The next stop was the nursery which was like some fairytale that I couldn't believe as for Mercy. I knew Edward had planned this room for daddy's little girl who would be spoiled rotten if he could help it. As we headed out of the nursery I noticed that everyone had disappeared since we entered the house. This was their subtle way of letting us be alone in the house... I couldn't help blushing deep red knowing they weren't expecting us at the main house tonight. When we enter a bedroom I realized this was our room as I saw my rocking chair in the room

"How?" I asked walking over the rocker.

"Charlie knows about the house. Esme asked for the rocker, so you would have it," Edward explain coming up behind me wrapping his arms around my waist.

"It's perfect," I stammered in tears as I turned around crying into his shirt.

"I figured that since Mercy couldn't be with us for Christmas, but could have it ready for you when she does come home," Edward smiled down at me kissing the tears away.

"You are the best," I sniffled as I reached up to wipe at the tears.

"Alice is going to decorate the living room for Christmas, so when Mercy comes home she'll have Christmas," Edward warned me.

Q&A contest

prize the ones with the right answers will be put in a drawing to be an extra in a future chapter.

Deadline – 5-11-12 & Drawing 5-14-12

* I will message anyone who is in the drawing, and I will post winner at 5pm eastern time in the us on my profile. I'll message them too*

What does Bella want to be when she grows up?

Where did Bella give Esme her gift?

What does Butterflies have to do with this chapter?

Who was missing from this chapter? (2 answers)

What color is the cottage?

Why does Bella feel guilty?

What did Emmett get?


	9. Chapter 9

Author's note: I wanted to move things along, so Charlie knows about the marriage and adoption. If I get five review with an tag on the end they want to see Charlie finding out; I'll throw in a deleted scene after the last chapter. This is not the last chapter.

Glancing down at the blanket that covered Mercy; it was amazing to feel her eating happily away. When the milk had first came it surprised me... Waiting for Mercy to be ready I had to pump with Esme help since I was shy to let anyone else help me. Now Mercy was a good solid three pounds and gaining every day like a trooper. Today I would be meeting the social worker since Edward had taken care of the home visit while I stayed here.

"Mrs. Cullen," came a voice making look up to see a woman in her early thirties maybe.

"Bella, please," I smiled trying to stay calm not wanting to bother Mercy.

"I'm Emma Rose. Mind if I sit with you a little," Emma asked pointing to the chair next to the rocker.

"Please sit," I nodded slightly.

Taking a deep breath I watched her sitting down while I wondered what she'd ask me.

"This awkward I know... You seem to never leave her side, and I've met the Cullens and Mr. Swan. Is there any chance I'd get to met your mother," Emma asked in a round about way.

"Renee is traveling with my stepdad who is a baseball player," I answered simply.

"You just turned eighteen and you are a newly wed," Emma start to say.

"Can I be honest with you?" I asked eying her.

"Sure," Emma nodded eying me.

"Most of my life I've lived with my mother who I took care of instead of the other way around. Until she remarried I took care of the bills, groceries, and anything and everything else. Don't get me wrong I love my mother. This is my choice I'm making here. Before I met Edward I had no desire to have a child or fall in love. Coming here was to make it easy for Renee to go on the road... First day I went to school I saw him, and I didn't know that he was the one yet. Slowly we got together... I got scared and ran home... He came after me... And I came back... We have had our ups and downs, but we always come together like something is pulling us together. Also I'm lucky to have an large extended family," I explained where I was coming from.

"I think I have everything I need for my report. She seems to everything a child could ever want," Emma smiled warmly at me.

"Thank you," I nodded slightly.

Smiling I felt as Mercy was falling asleep where she sat, so I got up placing in a bassinet that had replaced the isolette. Hearing footsteps I turned to see Carlisle coming down the hallway to make me go eat.

"I need to go eat. Want to come along," I looked to Emma who was now standing.

"That would be good. I've got some paperwork for you to fill out," Emma nodded pulling out a pile of papers.

Sipping on my coffee I signed everything Emma pointed to while she asked more questions; I almost felt like I was on trail for murder or something. The sweetness seemed to been drained from her as soon as we left NICU. At the moment she was getting on my last nerve. I just wanted her to leave already before I did something I regretted, and something told me she wanted me to do just that.

"Excuse me, I need Bella... Carlisle wants her to have a check up," came Jasper's voice make both Emma and myself look.

"That's fine... We're finished," Emma smiled as she gathered her papers.

Getting up I left my coffee on the table, and followed Jasper out into the halls away from her. Once a ways down the hall I finally stopped to take a breath. "Thanks for saving back there," I whispered leaning against the wall.

"I could tell you were about to ring her neck," Jasper smirked as he was only loud enough for me to hear.

"She seemed so nice, and then she turned on me," I snapped barely whispering. "Carlisle is waiting for us in his office," Jasper motioned with his head.

"Okay," I said after taking a deep breathe.

Walking down the halls I kept in step with Jasper; wanting nothing more than to get back to Mercy in her little room. Walking into Jasper since I was keeping my head down was like running into a wall, but at least he caught me before I could fall backwards.

"Stay vertical," Jasper smirked as he opened the door letting me go first.

Going inside I found Carlisle sitting behind his desk waiting for us.

"There you two are. Couch," Carlisle pointed as he looked up from his paperwork.

"Can't I," I started to say...

"No, your blood pressure is high," Carlisle cut me off and pointed to the couch.

Crossing my arms I went to the couch plopping down growling a little under my breath.

"Settle, Cub," Jasper laughed lightly.

"Just wait, I'll be able take you soon enough," I teased though clenched teeth.

"You're not going anywhere till you calm down. Jasper, go on home," Carlisle spoke keeping his voice even.

Relenting I laid down as Jasper left as I tried to calm down, but the thought of that woman made my blood boil.

"You have no ideal what it was like. She treated me like some kind of criminal. It was like I was being taken out to be shot for some horrible crime," I snapped in a low whisper.

Looking over to Carlisle I watched as he got up and came over taking a seat next to me. Keeping my eyes on him I saw him take a deep breath which I knew he didn't really need.

"There are always going to be people who treat you that way no matter what good you do or try to do," Carlisle sighed with a sympathetic look.

Rocking back and forth I watched as Mercy slept peacefully which I was more than thankful for. The more rest she got meant she was closer to coming home. Bring her home would be the end of living in this hospital, and I could breathe a sigh of relief. Although I knew she was doing everything she needed to come home; my heart was unable to except it until she was in the crib Edward got her.

"How are my favorite girls," came Edward's voice making me look to my left to see him knelt at my side.

"We're good. I think Mercy had a better day so far," I whispered trying to smile.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here with you. She works in the hospital a lot, and likes to flirt with Carlisle. Her anger was about him not returning," Edward trailing off at the end.

"I was just glad to get away from her," I sighed as Mercy started to whimper.

I started to get up but Edward stopped me, and held his hand up for me to wait. Watching him as he picked her up she calmed down in his arms almost instantly. The way he walked her back and forth was so natural; which shouldn't be surprising since he's good at everything. Sitting there staring at them together I could almost see them in the nursery. The mobile about the crib playing the lullaby he was humming right now. In the doorway I stand just wanting, and he would catch me of course.

"Where were you just now," Edward asked breaking through.

"At home watching you and Mercy in the nursery," I smiled with pure joy.

"We'll be home together soon," Edward promised as he laid a sleeping Mercy in my arms.

"Soon," Edward repeated as he kissed me gently on the lips.

"Soon," I agreed with a slight nod.

"Tonight I'm taking you home to sleep. You need to relax before Carlisle steps in even more," Edward warned me know I wouldn't want to.

"I'll go home..." I relented knowing I need to really sleep.

Plus I didn't want to push Carlisle who had been nothing but great. I owed him for this bundle here in my arms more than words could say. When we got home I'd owe him more for those midnight calls for every sniffle or noise.

"Thank you," Edward smiled as he kissed me again.

Leaning my forehead against his; I can't help but smile. There is this comfortable silence between us that is perfect. It doesn't last long before Mercy started to whimper getting louder and louder making her presence known.

"She hungry," I laugh a little along with Edward.

"If I didn't know better I'd say she was related to Emmett. Both get cranky when hungry," Edward teased as he went and grabbed the blanket for me.

"Mercy, your daddy didn't mean what he said," I cooed taking the blanket from him.

Walking into the main house I was glad we weren't going home tonight. I really didn't want to be alone tonight even though Edward was there. Tonight I needed to be around my family, and to feel close to them especially now. Edward led me to the kitchen where Esme was waiting for us, and had a plate of bacon mac and cheese and a glass of milk for me. Taking a seat I picked up the fork taking a few bites; as Esme took the seat next to me while Edward left us.

"Carlisle says Mercy is almost ready to come home," Esme smile warmly my way.

"I can't wait," I said between bites.

"If you want I could stay with you guys the first few days," Esme asked carefully.

"Please," I nodded putting my fork down, and then hugging Esme.

"Okay," Esme replied hugging me back.

"Thank you," I whispered as I let go blushing a little.

"Anything for you," Esme replied letting too.

"As it gets closer I feel scared... What if I do it wrong... I could really mess her up like Renee," I trailed of at the end like I had admitted some huge secret.

"Every new mother is nervous to bring her baby home. You'll be fine I promise, and Edward will be there along with me," Esme tried to reassure me.

Picking up the glass of milk I downed it fast like I was doing shots.

"I know... Excuse me," I said putting the glass down and get up leaving the table.

Walking out of the kitchen I head to the stairs going up know exactly where I was heading. I need some peace and quiet away from everything... Making it half away up I just stopped, and sat down where I was on the stairs. Playing with the bracelet Charlie had sent me when I was sixteen; I could remember how mad Renee had been when she saw it. The next day I told her I threw it out with the morning trash. "Hiding," came Alice voice causing me to look up.

"A little," I shrugged as she sat down next to me.

"You are going to bring Mercy home in a few days, and it is going to be amazing just you wait," Alice smiled taking me by the hand.

"You see all that," I said softly.

"Yes, I do. Plus I know you too well," Alice replied being serious.

"I guess you do," I agreed with a light chuckle.

"That's cute," Alice bubbled as she grabbed my wrist gently to get a better look at the bracelet.

"Charlie sent it to me for my sixteenth. The butterfly charms were surprise," I smiled holding it up taking a closer look.

"Charlie didn't get that," Alice spoke zoned as her eyes went wide.

"What," I asked confused.

"Huh? I got to go," Alice mumbled confused as she got up walking away.

...

I think I threw everyone off when I posted ch8, so if you go there at the bottom is a contest. To be fair I'm given eveyone who wants to enter until 5-18-12 and will draw between ones with the right answers 5-21-12. Picture links are on my profile, and one quest you'll have to see the picture for the answer.


	10. Chapter 10

*Please read the note at the bottom after reading the chapter*

Entering our home for the first time with Mercy; I couldn't believe we were finally bring her home. The judge had signed off on temporary custody until our finally hearing in six months. Heading upstairs with my daughter in my arms I went into her room laying her in the crib Edward had gotten her. Reaching up I turned the mobile with stars and moons a few times, and the lullaby started to play.

"This is real," Edward whispered as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

"After everything we're home," I smiled as I watched her sleep peacefully.

Resting my head against his chest I wish we could just stay like this right here.

"Tire," Edward asked in a whisper.

"Hmmmm," I sighed feeling the wear of the day.

"You need to get some sleep before she gets hungry in a few hours," Edward suggested softly in my ear.

"I don't want to leave," I shook my head from side to side.

"Come on she is going to be right here. Esme is right there looking over her," Edward pointed to Esme sitting in the rocker.

I hadn't heard her come in, but I was use to it by now.

"Thank you," I mouthed as Edward lead me away from Mercy and the nursery.

As soon as we were in the hall he swept me up in to his arms; carrying me off to our room which was lite with candles every where.

"Wow," I stammered totally surprised.

"I know we haven't really had a chance to be together here," Edward smiled my crooked smile.

"Human," I grumbled as my stomach growled loudly.

"I love your human moments," Edward chuckled lightly.

"Do we have any food in the fridge?" I asked really feeling the hunger.

"Emmett stocked the fridge with the list Esme sent with him," Edward answered quickly.

"I'll go fix me something," I said heading for the door.

"Let me," Edward stopped me and kissed me passionately.

"Um okay," I mumbled as my brain was foggy.

"Call your dad and let him know we made it home," Edward suggested as he handed me his cell phone.

As he left I opened the phone dialing the house knowing Charlie would be home by now.

"Hello," came Charlie's voice after a few rings.

"We made it home," I spoke up as I started to pace.

"She settle in alright," Charlie asked seeming nervous.

"She's fast asleep right now, and Esme is in the nursery. That way I can get a little sleep before she's hungry," I rambled a little.

"Well I'm glad it's going good. I'll let you go so you can sleep," Charlie trailed off a little at the end.

"Night," I replied as we hung up.

Closing the cell I place it on the nightstand. Climbing in the bed I just wanted to lay down for a minute, but before I knew it I was fast asleep.

Hearing Mercy's cries over the baby monitor I rolled out of bed, and made my way without tripping to the bedroom door. Taking my time I knew that getting out of my bedroom was purely luck nothing more. I'm coming was all I could think as I got closer and closer to the nursery. Getting to the door I saw Edward already there trying to calm her down which she was having none of it.

"She's hungry," I mumble walked over taking Mercy from him.

Settling into the rocking chair I noticed I was in a nightgown...

"Esme said it would be easier," Edward explained softly.

"Where is she," I asked taking the blanket from him and putting it over me.

"She went to fix you something; when she heard you get up," Edward answered as I unbuttoned the nightgown under the cover of the blanket.

Getting Mercy into the right spot her cries subsided as she began to eat happily.

"It's weird I feel completely awake right now," I mused as looked up at my husband.

"You're running on adrenaline... I'm here to help you anyway I can," Edward smiled as he bent over me to brush his lips against mine.

"How did I get so lucky," I mused as looked up at my husband.

"I'm the lucky one," Edward disagreed.

"You've given me so much. A family, true love, daughter, and so much more than you'll ever know... For most of my life I've been scared of wanting all those things. I mean my own parents couldn't do it, and I was a mix of both of them," I blinked back a few tears that were in my eyes.

"I think someone is asleep," Edward whispered point to the blanket.

"May I," came Esme's voice causing me to look up to see her standing next to me.

"Yes," I nodded handing Mercy to her grandmother carefully.

Buttoning up my gown I then removed the blanket from me, and handed it to Esme as I got up from the rocker.

"Let get you some food," Edward suggested putting his arm around my waist.

"I am hungry," I mumbled putting my hand to my stomach.

"We'll take care of that," Edward replied leading me out of the room.

Walking downstairs I was glad have Edward there to keep me from tripping myself up. Carlisle had given me enough stitches from falling on the stairs. No needed to tell Edward, or tell Carlisle that it was the stairs most of the time. That would just get me carried around... No, thank you! Getting to the kitchen Edward flipped a light on; as I took a seat at the counter to watch him.

"What would you like?" Edward asked looking my way.

"Mac and cheese with bacon, and a BLT sandwich hold the mayo. A glass of ice sweet tea too," I smiled from ear to ear.

Sitting on the bed biting into the BLT I was so in love with this sandwich it tasted amazing. It didn't hurt that BLT was my favorite food in the world. I was the happiest girl in the world eating away. Seeing Edward watching me I blushed a deep red cause although I was use to him not eating he never watched me before. Normally he would look off somewhere talking...

"What," I mumbled thinking I had something on my face.

"I'm going to go out to the main house... I want to talk to Carlisle," Edward admitted eying me.

"It's fine... I got Esme here with me. I promise," I replied encouragingly.

"I'll be back before you can miss me," Edward whispered as he stood up and kissed my forehead before leaving.

Finishing my sandwich I turned my attention to the mac and cheese with bacon. What can I say I love my bacon... Taking a big spoonful I then heard a knock on the door.

"Come in," I mumbled with a mouthful of food.

Who is it Esme...

"Can I come in?" Esme asked sticking her head inside.

Nodding I motion her to come in as I quickly chew the food in my mouth and swallow.

"Mercy?" I questioned as she sat down.

"Fast asleep in her crib," Esme smoothed with her gentle words.

"Good," I sighed a sigh or relief.

"How is it finally being a mom at home?" Esme asked looking my way.

"Strange, I keep expecting someone to show to take her from me," I shrug stirring my mac and cheese just staring at it.

"Alice doesn't see that happening," Esme tried to comfort me.

"I know... There is this cloud of doom over my head saying you're too happy," I confessed knowing Esme was the only one I could say this too.

"It's okay to be happy. You've earned this and so much more. Sometimes I think you and Edward are alike in someways, but you're so different that makes you perfect for each other. There is always someone to talk you off your edge, and you see the best in each other. Mercy is going to have a great life with two amazing parents who will love her always," Esme explained reaching out and taking me by the hand.

"If I'm half the mom you are I'll be pretty close to perfect, and Mercy will be one awesome person when she grows up," I smile wiping the tears from my eyes with my free hand.

"I love you for that, but you are a great mom. A great mom all on your own without any input from me. Don't be afraid to make mistakes cause you will make them. Some will turn out for the better, and it will blow your mind. Then some will be stepping stones to becoming a mom in your own right. Live and learn to be the wonderful you," Esme said making me feel so loved.

Waking up in my own bed I rolled over to be face to face with my amazing husband. Husband... I have one of those and a kid... Who would of thought? Not me... Laying my head on his chest I look up at him smirking because I'm happy really happy with my life. It that moment when you realize life can't be any better, but at the same time just keeps getting better.

"What?" Edward questioned eying me.

"I love you," I smile as I reach up pressing my lips to his.

Hearing an knock at our bedroom door groan as I bury my face in his chest.

"Come on you can do that any time! Esme won't let us see the littlest Cullen until you get up," Emmett pouted making me laugh a little.

"He'll break our door," Edward warned with a knowing look.

"Give us five minutes," I groaned sitting up and stretching my arms.

"He's gone for now," Edward smiled my crooked smile as he sat up kissing my neck gently.

Rolling out of bed I grabbed my robe hanging up near by because I wasn't ready to get dressed just yet... Walking to the door I looked behind me to see Edward in tow. Opening the door I headed downstairs to the kitchen where Alice was waving a bag in my face.

"Banana Nut Muffin from downtown Los Angles," Alice bubbled excitedly.

"Alright," I mumbled still a little sleepy.

"I hear it's the best," Alice said as I took the bag.

"Plus bananas are healthy too," Alice continued as I pulled out the muffin.

Opening the bag the smell hit my nose churning my stomach; shoving it back in Alice's hand I ran to the sink. Tossing everything I had eaten the night before I felt my hair pulled back from my face. After a few minutes I stood up as Edward let go of my hair and handed me a kitchen town to wipe my mouth.

"There's peanuts in it. I'm allergic. The smell makes me sick," I explained turning on the water.

"I'm sorry," Alice apologized over and over.

"I'm fine," I promised washing my face.

"It's gone," Alice rambled as she disappeared out the kitchen door.

"Let's wait on eating a little," I frowned a little not wanting to see food.

"Okay," Edward agreed as I dried my face before tossing the towel in the sink.

"Thanks," I said thankful as I shut off the water on the other side of the sink.

"Let's go into the living room... Esme is coming down with Mercy," Edward whispered as he lead me out of the kitchen.

"As long as no one tries to feed me," I joked dryly...

Going into the living room I sat down just as Esme came, and handed my daughter to her uncle Emmett who held her like a china doll. You could see she was well loved by everyone in the room even Rosalie.

Q&A

Q: Can you be allergic to a scent?

A: Yes

Q: Can an allergic reaction to a scent make you sick?

A: Yes

Winner of Contest: Lexi who will be in a later chapter and I have ideals churning in my head I haven't share with anyone.

(only Lexi entered the contest, so she won with the right answers)

Look out for Lexi's role in this story, and it will be well worth the wait...


	11. Chapter 11

Six Months Later (Mercy- 8 months)

Standing in the kitchen cut up the two little pancakes I'm so happy to final go to the court hearing today. In a few hours she'll be all mine and Edward's forever and ever. Feeling two arms wrap around my waist I know my husband's touch. Turning to face him I reach up my arms around his neck smiling from ear to ear as I go in for my morning kiss nice and slow.

"Ma ma," calls Mercy making turn to see Mercy pulling up with the help of kitchen table.

"She's standing," I whispered in amazement.

Then it happened she took a couple of shaking steps towards me before falling on her butt. Holding my breath I expect her to start crying any second, but she burst out laughing and clapping looking proud.

"She's resilient just like her mom. Never doing the expected," Edward soothes my nerves knowing I don't like Mercy falling.

"Get the plate, Daddy," I try to smile as I scoop up Mercy putting her in her highchair.

Sitting in the chair I looked up to see Edward sliding the food on the tray, and Mercy picked it fistfuls nibbling away at what was sticking out of her hands.

"Seems like yesterday that she was so small she would fit in the palm of my hand," Edward said taking a seat on the other side of Mercy.

"Mo mo mo," Mercy chanted patting her tiny hand together making me and Edward look to see she had finished.

"Mo, Daddy," I laughed looking from Mercy to Edward.

"Mo it is," Edward shook his head laughing as he got up taking the plate with him.

Every day it seemed her now dark brown hair got curlier and curlier, and she was more beautiful than the day before. I knew somewhere that it had to be the fact that I saw her as my daughter. Today a judge would make it official that Edward and I were her forever mom and dad. That made me think about the woman who gave birth to her and walked away. For a long time I had been so angry towards this woman I didn't even know at all. Along the way I had to let go of my feeling cause I didn't know why she choose to do what she did. Even now I didn't know... Seeing Edward pretending to be a plane as he fed Mercy a little; it snapped me back to breakfast with my little family that was my own.

"Where you go?" Edward asked turning to look at me for a moment before looking back to Mercy who was loving the attention.

"Just thinking," I smiled as I shrugged a little.

I'm doing a lot of that today too," Edward nodded not asking even though he wanted to badly.

"Today is the day... I'm so nervous and excited," I admitted blushing just a little.

"I know," Edward agreed smiling my crooked smile.

Walking out of the courthouse I was surprised that it went so smoothly as it did. I was so glad Charlie and the Cullens had come with us cause it meant so much to Edward and me both. Mercy was happy as a calm unaware of what had just happened because Jasper was holding her as she clutched the white teddy bear she got. Then I spotted her watching us from across the parking lot. I knew those eyes even from here...

"I'll be right back," I said to Edward as he followed my eyesight.

"Okay," Edward nodded letting me go.

Crossing the parking lot I half expected her to run away from me, but she didn't move an inch from where she stood. For so long I wondered what she looked like who was she I didn't expect what I saw. Her hair was blonde and curly... There was small things that reminded me of Mercy.

"I'm not sure where to start. I'm Bella," I spoke up breaking the silence.

"Ella, I'm Ella," Ella stammered nervously.

"Ella is pretty name," I tried to be friendly.

"She's so big," Ella whispered looking over my shoulder.

"Mercy is almost up to weight with other babies her age," I reply without thinking first.

"Mercy is a good name," Ella mumbled as she wiped away a tear.

"Why did you leave," I asked unable to stop myself.

"I'm barely nineteen no family or any support... The doctor wasn't even sure she survive, and I could afford the bills. Plus she deserved a dad and mom who loved each other. And a family to make her feel special... How I grew up isn't," Ella explained with tears in her eyes.

"Do you want to hold her," I asked which took all my strength.

"No, this is fine," Ella shook her head a little.

"Alright," I said trying to not sound relieved.

"I couldn't have asked for more for her. Thank you for that," Ella smiled slightly as she spoke softly.

"We love her the world over," I smiled ever much the proud mama I was.

"I should go," Ella excused herself taking off before I could interject.

Standing there watching her retreating form a part of me wanted to go after her, but another part knew better than go after the woman who was a stranger. Looking back to my family I could see Edward's worried expression on his face asking to come to me. Shaking my head I knew I needed a minute to collect myself. Closing my eyes I took a deep breath in as I turned my focus to my family waiting for me, and my daughter who needed me to be the mommy that she needed every day. Opening my eyes I walked towards my waiting family... Just needing one of those hugs that only your dad can give; I walked strait into Carlisle open arms let him hold onto me.

Watching Mercy tug on Emmett's hair as she waddled around the living room at the main house was to funny. He had to crawl around on the ground just so she could reach. Still unable to get Ella out of my mind I turned leaving the room; heading upstairs to Carlisle's office to be alone. Reaching the door I opened it just enough to slide inside; even though I knew only Charlie and Mercy didn't know where I was. Walking over to the window I noticed a window seat I hadn't noticed any of the countless times I had been in here before. Taking a seat I noticed as the sky release a down pour of rain which was normal, but today it seemed very fitting for it to rain with everything that was going on. All of it had left me a bit torn between happy and something else all together... Staring at the rain beating against the window I found the sound soothing instead of annoying; like in the beginning when I first came to Forks a few years ago now. Hearing a light knock I looked towards the door, and saw Carlisle coming through the door coming my way. Slowly he came to his chair sitting down before turning to face me.

"Sorry," I mumbled feeling guilty he felt like he had to knock.

"Today has been a hard day for you... Facing that woman like you did with such strength and grace... Not many could have been kind, but you were to someone," Carlisle trailed off at the end as he took my hand in his.

"I want to meet her for so long, and then when she was in front of me I wanted her to go away. All I could think is she's going to take her... That horrible," I stammered trying not to cry. "You're not horrible; you're just human," Carlisle corrected me gently.

"I don't feel so human... You taught me better," I sniffled as few tears fell down my cheeks. "I'm so proud of you. You did everything you could to be kind to her despite what you felt. That takes a lot of courage," Carlisle said smiling warmly.

"Charlie?" I asked changing the subject.

"He left a little while ago," Carlisle answered letting me get away with it.

"I should go help Esme clean up," I mumbled swinging my legs off the seat.

"Esme and Alice are already finished and Mercy is down for a nap in Rosalie's arms in her and Emmett's room," Carlisle whispered answering me my question and my next question too before I ask.

"It's okay to be happy, right," I questioned letting my guard down.

"You have every right to be happy. It's been a long road with Mercy with ups and downs along the way. Edward and you both have earn the right to be happy today of all days," Carlisle reassured me as he gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

Sitting in the living room on the couch with Jasper I zoned out on the tv not really watching what was on. I was waiting for Edward to return from his hunting trip with Emmett and Carlisle. We both hated being away from each other even for short periods. Hopefully he got back before Mercy noticed he wasn't here because she would have a melt down in a instant if she knew.

"Bella, are you okay," came Jasper's voice making me turn to look his way.

"Fine, why," I asked confused by the question.

"You haven't moved in twenty minutes," Jasper whispered looking worried.

"Huh," I mumbled as I stretched my limbs noticing they were slightly stiff.

"Where have you been," Jasper continued softly.

"I don't know I wasn't really think about anything really," I shrugged it off casually.

"You're hand is moving," Jasper pointed out making me look.

He was right it was moving like it wasn't apart of the rest of my body. Quickly he placed a pencil in my hand with a pad of paper on it. Soon the picture got clearer and clearer as my hand shaded and created depth. It was me as a child... I was alone in a closet... Then I saw I was wearing my bracelet...

"What," I whispered staring as it seemed so familiar yet like some far away memory.

Also it was like a word on the tip of your tongue, and you know you'll kick yourself in the butt later over it. As much as I wanted to there was something blocking me from remembering... Looking up at I could see Jasper eying me carefully, and something clicked that I had let got before.

"Bella," Jasper questioned looking at me weird.

"Alice knows something," I mumbled to myself more than to him.

"You're giving her too much credit. Only you know really... She'd never hide something," Jasper disagreed with me being completely serious.

"What does she know," I eyed him wanting what answer he could give to me.

"That the bracelet didn't come from Charlie, but she doesn't know who gave it to you either," Jasper answered looking apologetic.

"I've never been artistic before that I can remember, but now I just have this need to draw like nothing before," I said softly as Jasper handed me another piece of paper.

This time I found myself drawing a place I had never seen before... There was rolling hills and tall trees in the background and then I added a farmhouse with a barn down worn path. On the wrap around porch sat a pie that I knew was fresh baked apple pie. I could smell which was weird even for me.

"I'm was the tree house," I whispered as could see it in my mind.

Still I couldn't put it together yet; I had pieces that didn't make sense yet. I need to know what I didn't cause it was there right under the surface.


	12. Chapter 12

Author's Note: Sorry this took so long... It was emotional writing this more than I expected... Plus I had a wedding in which I took photos and video, so I had to do all the work for that too.

Watching Mercy play on her blanket in front of me as I sat on the couch; clutched in my hand was the pictures I drew a few days ago. Today Charlie was coming over not knowing I knew something was very wrong... I didn't want Mercy here when it happened, so Esme was taking her back to the main house. Something inside me told me this wouldn't go well at all.

"Morning," came Esme's voice as she appeared out of thin air.

Mercy burst out laughing and reaching for her grandmother like she always does...

"Gam Gam," Mercy squeals making me smile.

"Hey pretty girl," Esme smiles warmly as she picks Mercy up.

"Ma ma," Mercy frowned as she pointed to me.

"Mama is going to be fine. Daddy will take good care of her," Esme soothed as she kissed Mercy's cheek.

"She's so smart," I try to look happy for her.

"Just like her mama," Esme agreed as she looked worried.

"She ate just a little bit ago, and I just changed her a minute ago," I rambled off.

Hearing a knock I watched Esme disappear in a flash with Mercy out of sight. Taking a deep breath I headed for the front door knowing it had to be Charlie. Getting to the door I reached out opening the door with my free hand I saw Charlie. Opening the door all the way I let him inside closing it behind him; leading him to the living room I wondered if really wanted to know. Motioning him to take a seat I stayed standing not ready to sit next to him yet.

"What's up, Kid," Charlie asked seeming completely relaxed.

"Was I adopted," I asked not even flinching a second.

"What," Charlie stuttered eying me.

"Am... I... adopted," I spoke slowly and pointedly.

"Why," Charlie choked out as he looked a worried.

"Cause I remember things... I don't remember who, but this wasn't from you I know it," I shook the bracelet in his face.

Watching him I saw a defeated man as Charlie's facade crumble before my eyes.

"We were told you would never remember. The agency said you were in a fire which killed your parents," Charlie relented as he looked away from me.

"Where did I come from," I asked in a whisper.

"New Mexico," Charlie answered being completely honest.

He was being honest, but it was wrong I knew it...

"Were you ever going to tell me," I demand as I was hit with the feeling of betrayal.

"They said it would do nothing but harm," Charlie said apolitically as he finally looked up at me.

"I think this is harm... How am I suppose to know where I come from? Or who I am? One day I'll have to tell Mercy about her mother, but she will have the right to know about her?" I stammered as tears streaked down my face.

Holding Mercy against my shoulder I watched as the storm brewed outside the large glass doors in the living room by the fire place. There was something about how they rolled across the sky, and the crackling moved loudly through the air so freely. It brought back memories of my childhood with Renee in Arizona, but they were the same and different at the same time.

"Hey," came Edward's voice from behind me as he slipped Mercy out of my arms.

"I remember watching storms like this on night when Renee didn't come home. The air felt so dry no matter how much rain poured down... Here it's so wet and cool..." I mumbled as I couldn't tear my eyes away from the door.

"We will figure this out," Edward said softly as he kissed my cheek.

"If you watch you can spot the moment that it's going let go. There it is," I whispered as the rain came down hard beating against the roof and windows.

"I'm going to go put Mercy in her bed," Edward replied as he tried to get my attention.

"Un huh," I nodded slightly as I swallowed hard.

Sniffling I tried to blink back the tears which wasn't working, so I went to wiping them with my hands. Then I felt as Edward turned me around, and wrapped his arms around me as he pulled me close.

"I should have been here," Edward apologized as I cried on his shirt.

All I could do was shake my head no because I had been bad enough to be there myself. Having him there watch I would of lost it... I wanted to break down the minute Charlie left, but I knew I had to hold it together for Mercy until she was asleep.

"Protecting you is a full time job," Hearing him sounding so serious knowing he wasn't made me laugh a little.

"I'm hopeless," I agreed laughing a little more.

"If I could just give you all the answers I would, but we'll get there together," Edward promised as I looked up at him.

"One day at a time," I sighed softly as I spoke.

Taking a deep breath I wanted to believe him so badly...

"How about some coffee?" Edward asked knowing it was my weakness after him that is.

"Coffee... That sounds like a good ideal," I said hesitantly with a slight shrug.

"Kitchen," he suggested in a gentle whisper.

"Would you mind if I took a drive? I need to clear my head," I asked wanting a little time to get out of my own head.

"Okay," Edward relented as he put a cell in my hand and the keys to my car.

No matter how much he complained about being unable to hear my thought; he knew me better than most did on a good day.

"I'll be back soon," I promised as I reached up kissing him.

Driving around I didn't know where I was going, or how long I had been driving for not really. When I finally stopped I saw I was parked in front of the main house which surprised me a little. Getting out I went taking a seat on the steps pulling my knees to my chest. Putting my head on top of my knees I heard the front door open I didn't bother to look to see who it was. As I felt the calming waves I knew who was sitting down next to me without needing to look.

"How was the drive?" Jasper asked sounding concerned.

"I don't know," I shrugged as I turned my head to look his way.

"Everyone is worried," Jasper replied softly.

"I feel like I'm in the dark... I know it's dark out side, but I don't," I started to explain before trailing off.

"I get what you mean," Jasper encouraged me to go on.

"It like everything I knew or thought I knew has been washed away. Now I'm left in the dark with nothing. No history... I feel like I'm lost out here; like I'm not me anymore," I stammered as the tears threatened to fall like rain.

"Right now I can't take away those feelings; no one can take them away not now... All we can do is be here for the fallout to catch you cause some day are going to be horrible while others are okay even good maybe. Just don't forget we are hear for you to lean on. We are your family and we do know you. You're the girl who took a child in that wasn't her blood, and who loved me after everything that happened," Jasper said he took my hand in his. He was trying really hard which meant a lot to me. I knew it was hard for him to be so close, and holding my hand had to be even harder.

"Thanks," I try to smile a little.

"There's no meed to pretend with me. It won't hurt my feelings," Jasper insisted giving my hand a gently squeeze.

"Wow," I sighed a sigh of relief not to try to be somewhere in okay.

"Emmett is inside on the video games. We could all just play for a while, and not talk at all for as long as you want. I can't promise that Emmett won't say something stupid," Jasper recommended looking back towards the house.

"I 'd need to let Edward know," I said not ready to leave just yet.

"Esme is calling him right now," Jasper answered helping me to my feet.

"I guess all that is left is to kick your butt, so lead the way to your slaughter," I joked halfheartedly knowing it was okay.

"Well I'd like to see you try... Not going to happen, little sister," Jasper teased me as he led the way inside.

After hours of non stop playing games I politely excused myself against the protest of Emmett who want just once more. I could feel my body giving over to exhaustion, so the plan was to crash in Edward's old bedroom upstairs for a couple hours. It was early still... Edward would cover with Mercy for me until I got home. Heading upstairs I saw the light in Carlisle's office was still on. Going down the hall I stopped in front of the door trying to decide whether to go in or not.

"Door is open," Came Carlisle's voice from the other side because he knew it was me.

Grasping the door handle I turned it opening the door to see Carlisle sitting behind his desk.

"Hi," I whispered almost as he motioned to a chair.

Slowly getting up I take the few steps to the chair, and sit down pulling my knees to my chest.

"I want to talk you about what is already in motion... After Esme came back after dropping Mercy off I called a lawyer to dig up your records. Also I'm send Jasper and Alice out to find out the truth where ever that might be," Carlisle whispered almost being careful.

Touching the roof of my mouth with my tongue trying not to cry yet again while holding my breath a bit.

"I am opening a can of worms... Someone went a lot of trouble," I asked breathlessly on the verge of tears.

Getting up Carlisle came taking the chair next to me, and turned me to face him.

"I know you. Not knowing will hurt you so much more in the end," Carlisle answered as he took my hands in his.

"Why could you been the dad I was born to," I mumbled as the tears fell down my face.

"I love you just like the rest cause in my heart you're mine in every way. Seeing you in pain after everything that's happened; I wish I could take all that pain on myself to protect you..." Carlisle said gently reaching up wiping at the tears.

"I love you for that... You've been a rock for me every time a storm blows threw... No, dad could do better than what you do for me not even Charlie. Charlie and dad don't exactly go hand and hand. Although when it comes to you; I couldn't imagine a more perfect it," I sniffled as I was open and completely honest.

"I think you need to get to bed. Come on and let me walk you," Carlisle motioned with his head as he gently patted my knee.

"Sleep sounds really good right now," I agreed as we both got up.

"They say everything looks better in the morning," Carlisle shrugged slightly as we walked out.

"Not sure I believe that right now; I not dealing well at all," I whispered as we walked down the hall.


	13. Chapter 13 Sequel to Follow

Author's Note: I should of ended this story last chapter, so I'm giving you this tag ending. For a while I've been trying to write what would come next, but it wasn't coming to me at all for the reason this story was finished. The next story is Bella finding out the truth about her past, and making a move into the future as a mother, wife, sister, and daughter. Promise to have a first chapter to the Sequel very soon.

My family searches for the answers that flood my mind daily... No one knows where this will head, but all we do know is I was right. I never truly belonged to Renee or Charlie; besides the fact I didn't mesh well with the human race. Who knows what will be found? One thing is for sure this is only the beginning of something bigger.

Bella

To Be Continued in : The Art of The Lie


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